Page 15 of Lion & Lamb

DOYLE: Trained him well, didn’t I? He’s better than a German shepherd in the front yard.

LAMB: I’ll bring Lupe in sometime to meet him. They can talk dog to dog.

DOYLE: Okay, enough chitchat. You’re calling about Archie Hughes, right?

LAMB: You sit at the dark nexus of the criminal underworld, Red. Tell me what you know.

DOYLE: Next of what? I don’t know anything. Not this time, Lamb.

LAMB: Red, don’t do me like that.

DOYLE: No, I’m serious. I’m not playing around here. You know how many people are calling me about their bets? This is costing me boo-coo bucks.

LAMB: Speaking of…

DOYLE: Oh no, don’t you freaking start with me too!

LAMB: It’s just that, without Archie on the team, I’m not feeling as bullish about the Birds, if you know what I mean.

DOYLE: If I hear anything about the murder, I’ll let you know. But in the meantime, your bet stays the same, capisce?

LAMB: You are an international man of mystery, Red. I’m counting on you.

DOYLE: Yeah, yeah, I’ll keep my ear to the ground.

LAMB: Right next to your mind in the gutter.

Chapter11

Transcript of phone call placed by Cooper Lamb to a private number

COOPER LAMB: This is the Federal Bureau of Homework Management. May I speak to Ariel Lamb, please?

ARIEL LAMB:Dad,I know it’s you.

LAMB: I’m sorry, I think you have mistaken me for some other odious authority figure. I am calling to let you know that…well, hold on a moment. Can you put your brother on the line as well? I do not care to repeat myself.

ARIEL: This isn’t 1995, Dad. There are no otherlines.

LAMB: This is super-serious and of deadly importance, Ms. Lamb. And your brother needs to hear this as well.

ARIEL: Don’t you have work to do or something?

LAMB: That’s exactly why you need to put your brother on the phone. He’s going to lose his tiny little mind.

ARIEL: (Shouting) Coop! Dad’s on the phone! (Pause) He said he’s coming.

LAMB: How’s Mom doing, by the way?

ARIEL: I’m not a double agent. Instead of this sneaky way of checking on Mom, why don’t you just ask her?

LAMB: I amnotbeing sneaky.

ARIEL: Aretoo.

LAMB: Amnotto infinity!

ARIEL: (Sighs) Coop’s here.

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