Page 33 of Lion & Lamb

MICHAEL BERNSTEIN: I don’t know yet. I’m calling you from Ardmore. Maybe that will tell you something.

SABLE: What the hell’s in Ardmore?

BERNSTEIN: A personal chef who may have baked his last soufflé.

SABLE: Shit, the Asian guy? Is he gonna make it?

BERNSTEIN: It’s kind of touch and go. He’s young, though, and I’ve seen people pull through worse than this.

SABLE: How could it be worse? I heard he took two in the heart.

BERNSTEIN: Two in the chest. Bullets are funny things. They can follow all kinds of paths in a human body.

SABLE: You have the chance to, uh, talk to the chef?

BERNSTEIN: Glenn, the dude’s unconscious.

SABLE: No, no, I mean before. Like, about the other thing.

BERNSTEIN: It wasn’t on my to-do list. Listen, my friend, I have to ask, just to make sure…

SABLE: Ask what?

BERNSTEIN: How much was the chef into you for?

SABLE: Hold on a sec. You thinkwehad someone do this?

BERNSTEIN: Look, I’m not judging, I’m just asking. I told you before, I need to know everything, no matter how minor.

SABLE: Far as I know, the chef was current. I didn’t even know he was part of our thing until my dad told me.

BERNSTEIN: So you had nothing to do with…

SABLE: Screw you, of course we had nothing to do with this!

BERNSTEIN: Glenn, calm the hell down, okay? And don’t get me wrong, this was not anything professional. But it does look an awful lot like someone paid the chef a visit to smack him around a little, and things went haywire. I just want to be sure I know all of the details before I, you know, massage things.

SABLE: You want a massage,Mickey,go to a rub-and-tug. Don’t call me up and accuse me of this bullshit. What, did I offend your tender sensibilities?

BERNSTEIN: No, man, I’m just sitting here enjoying my afternoon.

SABLE: Look, I’m sorry. I know how hard you’re working. Things are just tense around here. I’ve got private eyes up my ass—

BERNSTEIN: Who?

SABLE: You know. The sheep guy.

BERNSTEIN: (Chuckling) You mean Cooper Lamb?

SABLE: Yeah, him. He’s working for Francine, so I gotta play nice, but there’s a guy I’d like to put through a wall.

BERNSTEIN: A lot of people feel the same way.

SABLE: Then maybe somebody should do something about it.

BERNSTEIN: I’ll look into it.

SABLE: Yeah, you do that.

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