Page 103 of I Could Never

“There you go.” She laughed.

“He’s a great guy. I just don’t feel ready to give him the attention he deserves.”

“Translation: I still haven’t gotten over Josh.”

Not even trying to deny it, I held my hands up. “What do you want me to do? I can’t help how I feel…”

She blotted her lips and turned to me. “Pining for a guy who’s made it clear that you and he don’t have a future together because he feels too damn guilty to do anything more than fuck you is not a good use of your time, Carly.”

Her words were harsh. They literally hurt my chest.

“I’m aware of that.” I swallowed. “But you do know that feelings aren’t always based on logic.”

She sighed and shook her head. “Alright…I’m sorry. It’s a little too soon for tough love. I’m gonna head back out there. How about I tell the guys you’re not feeling great and needed to head home?”

“You’re gonna make fun of me for days if I do that.”

“Aside from my ball busting, what do you want to do right now?”

“I’d like to leave.”

“Okay, girl. Then go. I got you.”

“Thank you,” I said, feeling immense relief.

I hugged her before exiting the bathroom and slipping out a side door.

But I didn’t end up going straight home after all. Instead, I took a long walk down a nearby pier. As the sun set, there were so many happy people wandering about, readying to enjoy a Friday night on their party boats.

Listening to the sound of the waves crashing, I sat down on a large rock and took out my phone. Once again, I scrolled down to his name and typed:I miss you.

But this time, I actually sent it.

CHAPTER 29

JOSH

I LOOKED AROUNDthe restaurant, anywhere but at her. There was nothing wrong with Sydney, and she held the distinction of being the first woman I’d gone out with since being back in Chicago. I’d forced myself to return to the dating app because it was the only way I stood a chance at moving on. Based on my lack of interest from almost the moment we sat down, though, it would seem that decision might have been a bit premature.

Sydney had done most of the talking this evening. She told me her divorce was recently finalized, and she’d just reentered the dating scene.

“This is my first time out, actually,” she explained.

Great.First time out, and it was wasted on a man who wasn’t that into her. Now I really felt bad for the poor woman. “I didn’t realize that. You mean like the first date since your husband?”

“Yes.”

“You said you were new to the dating scene. I didn’t actually think this was your first date.”

“It is. And I feel like I won the jackpot.” She batted her lashes. “You’re adorable.”

“Well, thank you.” I swirled my drink. “This is my first time out in a while as well…since I’ve been back.”

“Back?” She tilted her head. “Where did you go?”

“I went home to Woodsboro, New Hampshire, to take care of a family issue.”

“Oh.” She placed her napkin on her lap. “Is all well now?”

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