Page 26 of Pretend With Me

I stood abruptly, excusing myself as the first tear escaped and slid down my cheek before I could stop it. I ignored everyone as I pushed through the door and into the crisp late spring air. I turned the shop’s corner without thinking, stepping into the small alley between two buildings. Leaning against the brick walls, I closed my eyes and wiped furiously at the onslaught of tears that were determined to follow the first escapee. At this point, I wasn’t even sure why I was crying. It was some festering, molten mix of disappointment and frustration and heartbreak that I didn’t currently have the mental capacity to untangle. I took a series of deep breaths, trying to stop the flow of tears so I could get back inside before someone came looking for me.

I gave a slightly hysterical, very watery laugh at that thought. I knew that no one would tear themselves from Sissy’s orbit long enough to check on me. I had been forgotten the moment the door closed behind me.

“Everything okay?”

Holden followed the question into the alley.

Shame coated my cheeks in red. I ran the backs of my hands across my warm, damp cheeks, trying to erase the evidence of my tears. I stood up, squared my shoulders, and pasted on a smile.

“Yes, fine. I guess the emotion of the moment got to me.” I gave him as much of the truth as I was willing to share.

Holden just stood there with an assessing gaze as silence filled the alley. If this was an interrogation tactic, it was definitely working. I could feel the words bubbling up waiting to burst out of me in a desperate attempt to fill the quiet.

“It’s not every day that your sister tries on wedding dresses.” I finally cracked, although I had a feeling that—with Sissy—wedding dress shopping would happen every decade or so.

“I didn’t realize that you two were so close.” Holden answered, his voice giving nothing away.

“Yep, that’s us. We’re so close.”Close like a parasite and its host.

“Really? You’re so close that this is only the second time I’ve seen the two of you in the same room.” Holden pointed out like he was freaking Sherlock Holmes all of a sudden.

I shifted my weight from foot to foot, trying not to look like I was frantically attempting to make up a believable excuse to explain my perpetual absence from all things engagement and wedding related.

“Well, as I said at dinner, work’s been super busy lately.” I shrugged, feigning a calm, unbothered air. “I was so disappointed to miss...everything I’ve missed so far, but it doesn’t change the fact that Sissy and I are close.”

I tried not to cringe at my slipup while Holden’s eyes seemed to roam over every inch of my tearstained face.

“Bullshit.” The word ricocheted through the alley like a bullet, unexpected and startling.

I took a step back, the abrasive brick digging into my back.

“Excuse me?”

“You and Sissy aren’t close.” He stated like there wasn’t a single doubt in his mind that he was right.

“I don’t know what you want from me, Holden.” I said on a defeated sigh. I didn’t have the energy or desire to have a debate with him right now. Frankly, the only thing I really wanted to do was hop in my car and drive straight back to Savannah.

“The truth.”

The arrogant authority in those two words — as if he were entitled to my truths — had me bristling with indignation, and I was so grateful to feel anything besides this...this grief.

“This isn’t the courtroom. I’m not under oath. You don’t get to demand anything from me. I gave you my answer. I’m sorry if it’s not what you wanted to hear, but it’s the only answer you’ll get.”

I moved to walk past him, but his arm shot out, stopping me. Those long fingers I had admired earlier wrapped around the exposed skin of my upper arm, holding me gently but firmly in place. I looked from his hand to his face, and I was startled by the intensity of his gaze.

“Sutton,” he began, and the sound of my name from his lips made my heart take flight in my chest.

I yanked my arm out of his grasp and walked out of the alley without looking back, too much of a coward to hear what he would say next.

11

The week settled into an easy rhythm. I took Daddy to work in the morning and drove him around to his various job sites, making sure that he didn’t overdo it. Sometimes I’d work at one of the empty desks in the office, or I would pull up my mobile hotspot and work from the truck when he was on site. In the evenings, I would play catch-up with any work I hadn’t been able to get done during the day.

It took some getting used to at first, but as the week went on, I found myself grateful for the extra time I was getting to spend with Daddy. Mama’s home-cooked dinners weren’t exactly a trial either. The cherry on top was that Sissy was rarely home.

By the time Friday rolled around, I was feeling pretty good about the entire arrangement. I dropped Daddy off at a meeting with the mayor and city planner — one of the buildings on Main Street that was designated as a historic landmark was going to be renovated — and drove to a new coffee shop called Drip. It was located in what used to be a combination thrift/antique store, and I figured it’d be the perfect spot for me to virtually attend our weekly team meeting.

The interior of Drip would have looked right at home in any of the trendy neighborhoods of Savannah, and it smelled like roasting coffee beans and heaven. I ordered an iced caramel macchiato and sat down at one of the empty tables, digging through my bag for my headphones. I hit the connect button and waited for the meeting to start.

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