Page 19 of The Alpha's Betrayed Mate

“Still nothing,” he said, sounding tired to his bones. “You can almost taste the demonic taint in the air. It feels like waiting for a storm to break. If we had more numbers I’d almost want to take the fight to them, just to get it over with.”

Venna almost laughed. “Speaking of storms,” she said faintly. Belmont was halfway through a glass of water in the kitchen, and he looked over at her curiously as she spoke. She’d gone over about a dozen different versions of breaking this news to him, but right now, they all felt ludicrously inadequate. All she knew was that she had to tell him. The longer she nursed this secret, the more she’d dwell on the last time she’d told him something this important… and the more she’d dread him breaking her heart all over again. “I have to tell you something.”

“Is it Rylan?” He was immediately alert, striding across the room to join her on the couch. “Is he alright?”

“He’s fine. Spent the whole day running around with Syrra’s kids, so he’s sleeping like a baby.” It hadn’t been an intentional choice of words, but she felt a wild burst of laughter nearly break loose. Belmont was frowning in that faint, barely perceptible way he had, and she could see that he was wondering if she was about to bring up the subject of which they never spoke. As if she’d bother, she thought dourly. She knew him well enough to know that the moment she mentioned the passionate affair they’d been having for the last six weeks, he’d only freeze her out again. Well, that wasn’t going to work this time. He was going to have to find a new tactic to deal with this.

“Venna? What’s going on?”

She’d drafted a dozen different ways of delivering the news, most of them featuring some kind of witty little barb. But it occurred to her that whatever his reaction, this moment marked the start of something new between them. And she owed it to the life inside her to broach this subject like an ally, not an adversary.

So she took a deep breath, and let her defenses drop in front of Belmont for the first time since the day she’d told him that she was in love with him and he’d walked away. Let him run, if he was going to run. At least she’d know that when she told this story to her child one day, they would know that their mother had been brave.

“Belmont, I’m pregnant.”

Chapter 11 - Belmont

For a split second, the cottage around them vanished. Instead, he was surrounded by trees… not the lush, vivid vegetation of Kurivon, but the temperate forests of home. The leaves were still shining with dew, the cold snap of dawn was in the air, and Venna was at his side. She always was, when he thought about those days. The days before he’d been made Alpha. The blissful, dream-like days before he’d broken Venna’s heart. This was the memory, he realized. This was the moment she’d told him. This was the moment he’d done everything he could to block from his memory—the moment that the person he loved more than anything had found the courage that had always eluded him, and told him how she felt.

“What?” he heard himself say. Venna was smiling faintly, but her eyes were full of shadows, and he knew she was thinking about that day just as he was. Focus, he told himself. Halforst was another world, and that day belonged to a different life. “Are you sure?”

She nodded. “Lorekeeper confirmed. Only a few weeks, but… it’s real.” He didn’t move, didn’t so much as let his gaze flicker towards the door. The only explanation for the sudden narrowing of her eyes was that she’d read his mind. “Don’t you dare leave this room, Belmont.”

Shame burned in him, hot and sudden, and it turned to anger just as quickly. That, at least, was a familiar feeling. He pressed it down, taking comfort in the way it smoldered beneath his heart, the most reliable fuel source he could remember. “How long have you known?” he demanded, keeping his voice cold.

“A few hours, if that,” she retorted sharply. “I couldn’t have told you a second sooner than I did, so you’ll have to find another excuse if you want to make me a villain, here.”

“I don’t want that.” The suggestion shocked him. Another flash of that day with her in the trees, the last day she’d ever looked at him like she trusted him. “Was that what you thought, that day? That I was angry with you?”

“Of course I did.” Suddenly, she looked as uncertain as he felt. “For telling you the day you were being made Alpha. For—for ruining what we had.” She gritted her teeth, that familiar frustration flaring in her eyes. “Don’t avoid the subject. We’re not talking about ancient history, we’re talking about now. We’re talking aboutthis.”

“I can’t—” He took a breath, head spinning. “I need time to think. I need—”

“If you walk out of this room I’m coming after you with a knife,” Venna cut him off. It had the intonation of a joke, but there was a frightening seriousness in her eyes. “You can think right here, Belmont. I can’t—you can’t walk away from me. Not again.”

She was right. He had always hated it when she was right… hated it, too, when she knew that he knew she was right. She sat back on the couch now, arms folded across her chest. So much had changed since he’d last seen her that day. Both of them were so much older. Both of them had been through hell. But no matter how many new scars she might have, no matter how many battles she’d fought without him at her side, there was something in her eyes that hadn’t changed one bit.

“Well?” she said finally, her voice uncharacteristically soft. “What do you think?”

“You first,” he said, his eyes not leaving her face. He was surprised by how quickly the smile came to her face, how much it lightened the gravity of the situation.

“I’m happy,” she said simply. “I know that’s crazy and stupid, but I don’t care. I hadn’t even thought this was an option for me. After what I’ve put my body through over the last few years—” She bit her lip. “But it’s happening. I thought I’d be scared, I thought I’d freak out, I thought everything that happened would make me want to run like hell, but I just… I’m just happy.” Never one to leave a vulnerable silence to hang for long, Venna cleared her throat. “Maybe I’m just in shock or something. I don’t know. What about you? And don’t you try to play the shock card, I know you better than that. What do you think?” Another faint smile. “Ready for round two?”

“Round two,” he repeated, shaking his head as he remembered the early years of Rylan’s life, the way he and Tetra had struggled to navigate their relationship, their grief, the needs of the innocent baby who didn’t know the first thing about what they were going through. He remembered wave after wave of crushing guilt—guilt that he wasn’t doing right by his son, guilt that he wasn’t doing right by his pack, guilt that he wasn’t strong enough to be what everybody needed. “Venna, I—I can’t tell you how much I struggled when Rylan was born. Hell, I’m still struggling. You’ve said it yourself, I’m no kind of father to that child.”

“How dare you.” Her words were like a whip, snapping him out of his distraction. “How dare you put those words in my mouth. Do you really think you’re the first man who’s ever been overwhelmed by the prospect of being a father? Who’s struggled, who’s worried he isn’t good enough? Marroc was terrified when he found out Tetra was pregnant.”

“He was?” A flash of his childhood best friend’s face, that laughing arrogance. The idea of him being frightened of anything was absurd.

“Are you kidding? We talked about it all the time, those last few months….” He could see the tension in her jaw, and though he knew that this was the most they’d ever talked about Marroc and Tetra, he couldn’t bring himself to change the subject. “Of course he was scared. Of course he was worried about making mistakes, about letting Tetra down, letting their family down.”

“He was happy,” Belmont said weakly. “He was so excited about—”

“Ofcoursehe was happy, that’s why he was scared. Happiness is the scariest thing there is,” Venna said impatiently. “Everything good in the world comes hand in hand with the fear of losing it. Take it from me. It was absolutely miserable, living by myself in the wild for eight years, but at the same time, I had nothing to lose. No fear. Is that the life you want? Alone in the wilderness, not caring if you live or die?” She tapped an angry finger on the long, curved scar on her left arm, then ran it across the patchwork of smaller scars below. She had no shortage of scars to prove that point. He shook his head. “No. You don’t. So—I’ll ask again, Belmont. How do you feel, knowing you’re going to be a father again? Because it’s happening. I’m doing this. Even if you don’t want to.”

“I do,” he said, and though the words slipped out without a second thought he knew even as he spoke that they were true. “Of course I want to.” Venna was looking at him, clearly not quite convinced. “Rylan was—the most complicated thing that ever happened to me. Being his father has been harder than I could ever have imagined.” He took a deep breath. “But I love him. I love being his father. This—Venna, this is—this is amazing. Of course this is good news. Of course I’m happy. I just—”

“Nope,” Venna said quickly, her eyes aglow as she moved across the couch towards him. “Nope, we’re putting that thought on pause right now.” And then her arms were around him and he was holding her close, burying his face in her soft hair, breathing in the sweet scent of her and hearing his strange, dizzy laughter ringing in his ears. They never touched each other like this, never so much as brushed past each other in the hallway—except, of course, for when the tension grew too much and they tore each other’s clothes off. This was different. This was… he closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of her nestled against him, trusting and warm. He thought about the life growing inside her, about what the future might hold. And then he thought about the pack, and the brief bubble of calm popped.

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