Page 62 of Insatiable

“Come on, Kade. Are you going to give me the silent treatment theentiretrip?”

“I don’t plan onseeingyou this entiretrip,” he replies, monotone. “As soon as we land, this nightmare is over.”

I grit my teeth, annoyance and fury in my veins.

Kade has every right to be mad at me, but he still walked away. He still claims to despise me.

Yet right now I’m wearing his jacket because I was cold. If Kade truly, truly loathes the ground I walk on, why is he even taking me on this jet with him? Why did he back me against the wall in the studio? Follow me out of the manor to see who I was out talking to at the gate? Why pleasure me?

Why did he try to kiss me?

I gather enough courage to speak and turn to him. “I didn’t know what I was doing,” I say, filling the silence and attempting to calm my nerves.

I twist my fingers together. I’ve imagined this conversation a million ways, and it’s always easier to speak out in my head. Why is it so hard to admit what happened?

Kade driving faster and ignoring me isn’t helping.

“That night, I was—”Raped.

I stop, a lump sticking in my throat. I fail to say it aloud.

“It wasn’t…”What you think.“I didn’t…”Want to do it.But all I can finish with is, “I’m… I’m sorry.”

I look out the window to hide the tears building behind my eyes as I try and fail to use my voice. If I tell him what happened and how many times, he’ll think I’m dirtier than he already does. Used. Worthless. Or he’ll say I’m a liar. He might not believe me, and then I’d be called an attention-seeker, a manipulator – toxic.

I want so badly to tell him the truth, but it won’t come out.

Still no reply.

“Sorry,” I say again.

Kade scoffs. “Don’t waste your breath. I really don’t give a shit.”

I shake my head. “You obviously do, or you’d stop having such a terrible attitude with me.”

I turn to face him again and let a tear slip down my cheek, my lip trembling. “Ilovedyou. I wanted everything with you. Why would I ruin that? I would never intentionally—”

My body jerks forward as Kade slams on the brakes, the tyres screeching on the road until the car comes to a stop. Hair over my face, hands on the dashboard, I watch him with wide eyes as he heaves in breaths and grabs his lighter.

He shoves the door open and climbs out.

“Where are you—”

My voice is cut off by him slamming the door shut. I turn to look behind the car and see him running both hands through his hair.

I open the car door. “Do you know what? Fuck you, Kade!”

I walk towards him, his sleepy, fuming eyes on me as he puffs on a joint, and stop in front of him. “You left me. I needed you, and you left without even trying to fight for me!”

“Why would I fight for you?” he sneers. “I saw what happened in that video, and that was enough to show me your true colours.What’s done is done,right? Get back in the fucking car and get out of my sight.”

I snatch his joint and throw it away. “I didn’t know what I was doing! I wanted you—”

“Stacey, I swear to fucking God. Shut the fuck up.”

He moves closer. “You don’t deserve time to explain why you did what you did, and I really don’t care. I dodged a bullet getting away from you.”

My teeth clench, fresh tears spilling. “I wanted to go home to you. I cried foryou.”

---