Page 28 of Knot Alone

“I’m checking into the Center today, Charlie. That means I need to pack.”

“You don’t have to pack that!”

“How would you know?” I spit before I can think better of it.

Charlie puffs up. “I know I don’t want those kinds of things in the same house as my children! And I don’t want you bringing up all your dirty shit with my children around!”

“You came into my room, Charlie.”

“They know you’re missing, Maggie! They want to know why you smell weird! What am I supposed to tell them?”

I want to say, ‘Tell them that heats are a fundamental aspect of biology and nothing to be ashamed of,’ but it’s… not worth it.

It’s never worth it.

All my defiance deflates like a balloon. I just want to cry. I’ve been taking care of the kids all morning, doing their parent’s job and my heat isn’t dirty, it just is. And I’ve been… well, I’ve been excited for this one. Excited to spend time with Linus and Graham.

But now, I feel ashamed. “I’m taking my dirty omega self and my dirty Omega things to the Center, Charlie. Just like you wanted.” I gulp back tears as I snap, turning to my luggage and forcing myself to finish tucking things away.

“Just because you’re so weak that you can’t control this doesn’t mean that my children have to suffer while you’re here, Maggie.”

Charlie’s words are drowned out by white noise in my ears and the rapid beat of my heart. I breathe through it. A slow in through the nose and out through pursed lips, calming myself down before the tears welling up in the corners of my eyes can trickle down my cheeks. I won’t give him the satisfaction of tears. But there’s the sharp, angry scent of Beta in my room, in my den, when I’m so close to heat. That plus the upheaval of this morning has made me nauseous and I can’t tell if it’s anxiety or a heat symptom. The last thing I need is to add vomit to the mess of tight muscles and pains stabbing me the more Charlie talks.

My phone flashes with an incoming call and I grab it, looking for any reason to cut Charlie off. I catch his, “Are you even listening to me, Maggie?” But I don’t care, because it’s Graham.

I pick up with a relieved sigh. “Hey, Maggie! I’m all wrapped up at the Center. I’m laying odds that despite his grand plans, Linus has gotten nothing done today. How’s your morning going?” Graham’s voice is such a relief that I swallow to keep back a whine for my Alpha.

“Mags?” Graham asks.

“Could you come get me?”

“Absolutely.” I catch the click of him putting me on speakerphone. “Tell me your address.”

“Who are you talking to?” Charlie demands as he grabs at my phone. I snarl at him, teeth bared like a wild Omega from 10,000 years ago. Charlie stumbles away. “What the hell?”

I rattle off my address. “I’m about fifteen minutes away, Maggie.” Graham’s voice echoes through my bones. “Are you safe?”

“Yes.” Graham doesn’t ask if I’m sure. He trusts me.

“Do you want me to stay on the line?”

“No. Get here faster.”

“Done. Be ready for me.”

I hang up, some part of me wanting to snap feral teeth at my brother-in-law and sister.

“Maggie, you can’t treat people like that,” Marie complains with all the same lack of effort she put into scolding Charlie.

“I told you; I’m going into heat.” I grab my laptop and various charging cords, forcing myself to follow my usual packing procedure instead of shoving everything in so I can leave this room. I don’t know if I’ll ever be safe here again. I can’t make myself turn my back on them like I would’ve before.

“That’s not an excuse for baring your teeth at people! You’re not some knot-head Alpha!”

“No, she’s just a knot-drunk Omega,” Charlie sneers.

“Get the fuck out.”

They both sputter, stunned that I said it.

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