Page 46 of Bought By the Mafia

The call again. “I should have never said those words. What I meant was—”

“It’s fine. You don’t have to explain yourself. What we had was a classic holiday fling gone wrong.” She walled herself off, I realized. She didn’t want to pursue the topic further. It was fine. I myself was still reeling from everything she told me. All the mistakes I made because of what I thought she was came to mind. I should try to make up for that. But how? I could not think of a way to resolve the gulf that was in our relationship. Hell, I don’t even know if she wanted to resolve it. Our truce was a tentative one and the only thing so far that allowed us to even have this conversation. One wrong move and it could all blow up. There are other things I could do. Other ways to make it up to her.

“What if,” I started, not sure where I was heading. What if we made up? What if we start over? What if what? The words lingered in the air.

“You and I were never meant to be,” she said, as if reading my mind. “Our roads crossed once in a blissful moment and should have never crossed again.”

“You don’t believe that, do you?”

“I’m not the woman you want to marry. If we didn’t meet, you would have married someone else. Someone better.”

“Who? Allison?”

“I’ve seen the way you two interact. You finish each other’s sentences.”

“That’s because we’ve known each other for a long time. We’re friends, that’s it. I’m not in love with her Mona.”

And just like that, the nick name tumbled out. I didn’t even notice that I called her Mona until I heard her breath catch in her throat. I took her hand in mine and held in my lap. It felt soft in mine; I squeezed it gently. I love you. The words could not come out of my throat as much as I tried. And yet, the longer they turned in my head, the more sense they made. I love her. I’ve loved her ever since I met her and when I met her again, I fell in love all over again. Once I stopped fighting it, my heart felt like bursting. Even when I hated her, I loved her. I hated I was in love with her. And now? Now I want to scream it at her. At the city. At the world. But it didn’t feel right to say it now. She would reject them and I don’t think I could handle it.

“Mona,” I said again, softly this time, “I want to make amends.”

“You don—”

“I do. Please, let me.”

She looked hesitant. Her mouth opened and closed before she finally nodded. I lifted her hand and kissed it. I wanted to do more, but not tonight. Not yet. Even Simona seemed surprised when I told her to change for bed. She didn’t hesitate, though. She was just as, if not more, drained that I was. When she went to the closet, I got up, left the room, and went to the office downstairs.

I had to leave her so I could take in all I had learned on my own and also to give her space. Our relationship had shifted, my head was reeling and earth had fallen off it’s axis. A drink would be good, I thought when my gaze landed on the decanter on my desk. I poured a shot and gulped it down in two drinks. The fiery liquid burned down my throat and did little else to calm my nerves. What I needed was a plan. If there was one thing I was capable of was planning. I went over to the other side of the desk and sank into the chair. I had left my laptop on, which is something I didn’t usually do, but there were so many things on my mind when I came back from work, I must have forgotten to put it on sleep. Luckily, the notes app was on screen. My hands were tingling with so much energy when I typed. Step one. Earn her forgiveness. How else would she believe me to be genuine if she hadn’t forgiven me? It was going to be difficult to do, but it would require showing her I did not care about what she did before. That I had forgiven her. That one was going to be hard, and I had no idea how to do it.

On to step two. Woo her. That one was easy. Simona and I could go on a trip together. Somewhere far from this place. This apartment was too tainted with hate. I needed somewhere pure where we could rediscover our love. Some beach somewhere were it could just be the two of us. Barbados or Seychelles. Dante had a private island off the coast of Spain. We could go there. Or we could… No. She would smack me if I took her there. My plan might unravel. But it might not. It was a risk worth taking.

Step three. Renew our vows. Hell, renew everything. The entire marriage was built on a foundation of hate. A new marriage would be built on love. If she forgives me. If I woo her. If she loves me back. The thought of not having my love reciprocated was difficult to stomach and if at the end of it all, she didn’t love me the —

“Working late?” In my haste to jot down my plan, I didn’t hear the door open, or anyone enter. I looked up to see Allison standing in the doorway wearing a nightdress. A sheer, white silk dress that stopped at her thighs.

“I thought you were asleep,” I said. I’m sure I said it dismissively, but she seemed to take it as an invitation to enter. A little annoyed, I closed my laptop and leaned back in my chair.

“You don’t have to stop on my account,” she said, gliding over to my side of the desk.

“I wasn’t working.”

“This late? I know you, Gio. You can’t fool me.”

She was standing a couple of feet away from me now. She looked statuesque; I thought. Like a life-size doll. Pretty and cute at the same time. But not enough to tempt.

“If you thought I was working, wouldn’t you want to leave me to it?”

“You have more than enough money. You don’t need to work so late. Unless…”

I raised my eyebrows, not catching her meaning.

“Unless you’re hiding from someone.”

“My wife? I promise you I’m not.”

“Again. Can’t fool me as much as you try.” She stepped forward and turned the distance between us from friendly to intimate. If Simona were to come in now, she might think something is going on, I thought. That’s when I realized Allison had closed the door to the office. Her flimsy nightgown was also making me wonder about the purity of her intentions.

“My wife and I are happily married,” I said, pushing back my chair a little. Unfortunately, the leg of the desk was on the way.

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