Page 102 of Carbon

We compromised by going to a café that served salad, then it was back to waiting again. Emmy slumped across the centre console, resting her head in Black’s lap, and despite the way they bickered, I couldn’t help feeling a twinge of jealousy at their closeness. What if I’d lost my only chance at that?

“Are you okay?” I asked Sofia again.

“I’m prepared.”

That wasn’t exactly my question, but I understood why she didn’t want to talk about it.

“I’m not. I’m still trembling inside from being on TV earlier. I went to the studio with Angie once, while she did an interview as Sapphire, and even that made me nervous.”

“Thanks for doing it.” Sofia managed a half smile. “I get that you don’t like publicity.”

“Crazy, huh? Angie loved it. I think that’s why I enjoy writing so much—because I can spill my innermost thoughts onto paper, but nobody truly knows me.”

“Most people I know wear masks. Few ever take them off.”

“You included?” I asked, even though the answer was obvious.

“Me included.”

We lapsed into silence, and Sofia settled into a zen-like state as darkness fell and another hour ticked by. Ben wasn’t going to call, was he? Had he somehow missed the broadcasts? Black said a man on the run would keep up with the news, but what if he was wrong? Or what if Ben had run into Leroux again, or the—

It rang.

My phone rang.

“Unknown number,” Black said. Luke had linked my mobile to Blackwood’s computer system. “You planning to answer it?”

I unfroze and almost dropped the damn thing in my haste to snatch it up. Sofia gripped my other hand, nails digging into my palm.

Remember, deep breaths. Keep him talking.

“Gus?” Ben’s voice came through on speaker, a little quiet, a little tired, but unmistakably him.

“Ben? I’ve been so worried about you.”

He laughed, but I could tell it was forced. “Isn’t that my line? I saw you on the news today. What the hell was all that for?”

“The police made me do it. They said that if I cared about Angie then I’d do an appeal, and I could hardly refuse in case it made them suspicious. I’m so sorry.”

My words made me feel ill. I didn’t mind the occasional fib, but outright lying to the man I loved? What if he never forgave me?

In the front, Emmy and Black communicated with hand signals as a red dot appeared on Emmy’s laptop screen. Black checked the mirror and pulled out smoothly into light traffic.

“Don’t worry,trésor. I’m staying indoors in the daytime. How about you? Are you holding up okay?”

“Sort of. Mother became unbearable, so I’m staying with an old friend in London.”

“Fuck. Gus, you shouldn’t be in London. It’s not safe.”

“I remembered what you said, and I’m not going out alone.”

Black swung left onto a side street, and I grasped the handle above the door so I didn’t tip into Sofia’s lap. Her expression had hardened into one of determination rather than the worry she’d been showing all day, while I fell apart inside.

“Are you in a car?” Ben asked. “I can hear traffic.”

Think, Gus, think. “The flat I’m in is right next to the main road.”

“Who knows you’re there?”

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