Page 80 of Sinister Legacy
“You can never be like me, Keira. Do you know why?”
With a shake of my head, I whisper a quiet,“No.”
I want to memorize every inch of his face. His execution date is set. Soon, I’ll be all that’s left of Jimmy Hill and his stain on Blackwoods.
“Because you’re so much better than I ever was. So muchstronger.”He sits back and fiddles with the coiled cord. “I heard there’s a killer on the loose in Blackwoods.”
“Yes…” My voice is weak and shaky. “He… uh…” I clear my throat, straightening my back. “He plays evil games.”
“You’re his obsession?”
“The main star of the show, as he calls it.”
My father studies me intently as if he wants to memorize me. His actions broke our family, and there are so many questions I want to ask.
So many things I want to try to understand.
“Dad…”
His eyes collide with mine as I wipe wretched tears from my cheeks. I don’t want to be here, talking to my dad in a place of death and misery. I want to go for a walk along the river, feel the sun on my face, and maybe hold his hand like I did when I was little.
I want to be the only person on this entire planet who sees past the serial killer Jimmy Hill. The one person who sees the soul residing behind all that evil, but I dismiss that thought.
After he was arrested, my mom forbade any contact. As I grew older, I started to resent him and the heavy burden of his legacy. It’s too late now to mend any bridges.
My voice crackles with pain. “Why am I so broken, Dad?”
“You’re not broken, sweetheart.”
“Remember when I was little, and my mom spanked me after the squirrel incident?” I chance a look at him, finding him grinding his teeth. “The curiosity is like that now, but so much worse.” In the silence that follows, I admit something to my father that will soon be buried with him. “I’m scared, Dad. I’m so fucking scared.”
“I know,” he replies, his voice thick with regret. “If I could have turned back time…”
“Would you have stopped yourself from killing all those people?”
He lowers the phone for a beat, wiping his wet eyes before putting the receiver back to his ear. “No, sweetheart, I don’t think so.”
His words soothe me like the balm I’ve been seeking. At least I don’t have to live with the what-ifs now that he has admitted his ugly truth. Even in retrospect, my father would have still murdered. He was always destined to rot in this place.
“It was never a choice,” he tells me, and I get it.
My father can’t possibly know how much I understand the meaning behind his words. The look in his blue gaze, the slight sparkle, lets me know he sees me, too.
“It was a drive for you,” I whisper, placing my fingertips on the cool glass. “An all-consuming urge.”
His fingertips press against mine, and despite the barrier, I feel him. I feel each and every one of his unspoken words.
“You’ll be fine, sweetheart,” he assures me.
I look from our hands on the glass to his sorrow-filled eyes. “I’m sorry I never came to see you sooner.”
“I don’t want you to lose a single moment of sleep over it. I made my choices, and I had to live with those. I need you to know that losing you was the hardest part of all. I don’t regret a lot of things, no matter how cruel or sinister they may seem, but I regret hurting you. I’m a monster that deserves to be put to death, but my love for you was always real.”
“Don’t say that,” I whisper.
“Think of all the people I killed and the suffering their families endured. They deserve their justice.”
“Dad?”
