Page 3 of Beautiful Envy

I’d need to burn my clothes and scrub down my car just to be sure. It was the last bit of evidence tying me to the crime.

Washing my hair was significantly easier, the smell of Simon’s products enough to keep my focus as I lathered and rinsed. When I climbed out, I spotted my bag, sending a silent thanks to Lennox for bringing it in.

Dressing into something clean and soft helped put the rest of my body at ease as I retraced the steps I’d taken to get here.

I’d been careful, avoided all cameras and took the back roads. I had to trust I was safe for now.

Brushing my wet hair in the mirror, I assessed myself. My face was blank, all emotion drained away from me. My eyes were dark, the spark having been stolen. I didn’t like being this girl. I didn’t want to go back.

Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to embrace my emotions, knowing if I ran from them this time, I’d never come back.

When I was satisfied with what I saw in the mirror, I gathered my stuff, careful not to touch any of the blood on the clothes.

Lennox was waiting for me outside the door when I exited.

“Hey, how do you feel?” she asked. Her eyes washed over me, taking me in, almost like she was verifying I really wasn’t hurt.

“Better. Is there somewhere I can burn these?” I asked, lifting the pile of things I’d been wearing.

Her eyes dropped to the wad of clothes, her head nodding before she looked up. “I know the perfect place.”

She led me out back, tugging my hand as she stepped off the porch into a big backyard. Motion-sensor lights flashed on as we walked toward a brick circle a few yards from the house. When we neared, I realized it was a firepit.

“This work?” she asked, stopping to look at me.

“Yep.” Tossing the clothes into the circle, I looked around for something to light them with.

“Here,” Thane said from behind. I jumped a little but took the lighter fuel and matches he offered.

Squeezing some over the clothes, I stepped back as I thought about my next move.

“Here’s to never looking back,” I said, striking a match and tossing it into the pit.

Flames flew up, warming my cheeks, and I knew I meant that creed with everything in me.

Diary #1

Dear Mom,

A lot of crazy shit has happened since we last spoke. I don’t want to get into it all, mostly because I don’t want to relive it yet, but I know things will be different from here on out.

I’m at my friend Lennox’s house, and I realized something tonight.

One, she’s an amazing friend, willing to help me even if it puts her at risk.

Two, I want what she has. I’m a little envious of the easy way she can love the people in her life without fear of it being taken away.

I’d never begrudge her for having it. I know she fought for her life and for the love she has.

Which reminded me that I could do that too. I can fight.

So, I will stay with this man they seem to believe will help me. And I’m going to protect myself. I’m never going to let another man try to take anything from me. Whether it be sex, my life, or my future, it’s not going to happen anymore.

Are you ready to meet the new Darcie, Mom?

Love,

Me

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