Page 72 of It's Just You

I smiled at him, trying to look more confident than I felt. “I wanted to apologize again. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

Finn didn’t respond, so I picked up my overnight bag and pulled out a shirt and a pair of jeans. “What are you doing?” Finn asked, interrupting me in the process of pulling my jeans up.

“Uh… Getting dressed?”

“No, I mean… Why? Breakfast? It’s too soon for that, isn’t it? Or are you such an early riser you don’t want to come back to bed? Do you want a cup of coffee?”

I looked at him, bewildered. His voice was calm but somewhat confused, if I had it right… but he was the one who’d turned cold and distant in the first place. Now I was even more at a loss.

“I was going to leave, actually. I mean, it’s kind of awkward. I clearly managed to upset you, so I figured you—”

“What? No! I never meant to make you want to leave. Heavens, no.” Finn scrambled off, showing me his hot, still-naked body. He nearly fell from the bed in his haste to come to me, but then he just stood there and looked up at me. “I don’t want you to leave. That was… not what I meant at all.” He took a deep breath. “I haven’t shown anyone my face without makeup in years.” He fell silent, averting his eyes.

I cupped his cheek, raising his gaze to mine until he looked at me again. “It’s okay. You can wear what you want. It’s not a dealbreaker for me.” I kissed him softly. “I don’t care. I really don’t. I just… I want to get to know you better, that’s all.” I kissed him again, this time lingering on his soft, welcoming lips. “I really don’t care. I love looking at you, Finn. I love your body, your personality. You, the way you are. And even if you don’t want anyone to see your face, I will love you just the same.” I froze.

Shit.

That was not meant to—

Finn wrapped his arms around me. “I do, too,” he murmured, so quietly I could barely hear him. “Love you, I mean.”

My heart raced. “I… Fuck, I was so afraid it was just me.”

Finn laughed quietly against my skin. “Do you really think I’d be this open if I hadn’t fallen for you?”

“Uh, I’ve only seen this side of you, so I have no idea how you are otherwise.”

Finn laughed again. “Fuck, you’re right.” He took a deep breath. “No, I’m not that cuddly and soft and whatever usually. And… God, this is hard.” He hid his face again. “I never meant to fall in love with you. At least, I never expected for you to feel the same, so your question totally threw me off. I was afraid… still am… that you’re going to be repulsed.”

I raised my eyebrows, looking at him. “Care to elaborate? You lost me.”

“I have scars. Acne scars. Really, really bad ones. They… I hate looking at myself without makeup.”

“Oh my… Finn, I know.” I paused. “I’ve seen you with your acne… and honestly, it happens. I… I haven’t fallen in love with you because of the makeup, or the panties, or the way you look. I’ve fallen for you because of the way you are. Who you are. If you have scars, who cares? I certainly don’t.” I studied him, trying to see if I was getting through to him, but I failed to read his face because he seemed to be too comfortable burying his face against my shoulder. “I’m demisexual, Finn. I need to have a connection to someone to find them sexually attractive, for fuck’s sake! Do you really think a few scars will make me run away?”

That got a reaction, and when Finn finally looked up at me, I could see the tears glistening in his eyes. They clung to his long, dark lashes, and I used my thumbs to wipe them away. “I love you, have for a while now. Ever since… I’m not even sure. But no matter what, that won’t change because of something you can’t control. But just for the record…” I kissed him again. “I won’t ever ask you not to wear it, okay? If you feel comfortable without it, leave it off. If not, don’t. I don’t mind at all.”

“Why… I can’t wrap my brain around it. Really.” Finn bit his lip, still looking so insecure it made me ache. “I mean, how can you be so—”

“Because I love you. Makeup, panties, glitter, and everything else.”

“Sorry, this is just… I need a moment to sit down.” Finn released me and went back to the bed, where he sat down heavily. “Come here with me?” he asked, patting the spot beside him.

I wrapped my arm around him as soon as I sat, holding him close.

“It’s not only that I’m deeply ashamed of the scars. I’ve been bullied for the acne for so long. I just… need some time to wrap my brain around this. I never expected to find someone who’d take all of this in stride, you know?”

“You also didn’t expect to fall in love with your best friend’s brother, so there’s also that,” I offered — not totally helpfully, but I needed to lighten the mood.

Finn chuckled, so I’d succeeded at least a little. “I’ll give you that.” He paused. “Okay, wow. That was heavy. Way more than I expected it to be. I’ll need a few days to get it into my brain, okay? That’s nothing personal, just… Well. Anyway. Coffee, then bed again? It’s not my time yet.” He yawned, as though to prove his point.

“I don’t need coffee yet, if I get to go to bed with you right away.”

Finn’s eyes lit up. “I can get behind that.”

“I could totally make such a bad joke, but… Can I just hold you for now? Then we’ll see who gets behind who.”

“Ass.” He laughed, then said more seriously, “Well, one might even be involved in that.”

I groaned. “That was even worse than mine.”

“Then let’s shut up and you get undressed again. There’s a no jeans in my bed rule. Then we can sleep some more, or do whatever else we can come up with.”

“I might have a few ideas…” I murmured while getting rid of my jeans. Then I pulled him with me under the sheets.

---