Page 44 of It's Just You

I just… didn’t know how to start that conversation without sounding like a prick about some clothes.

By the timetwo days had passed, I’d started about twenty texts, trying to figure out the best way to approach Finn. None of them seemed to work. Everything I started with was so bland. We’d been getting along so well, had seemed to even enjoy some kind of friendship that had grown so fucking fast, but all of that had vanished along with the kiss.

Damn it. People said sex complicated things, but I hadn’t even gotten that close and I was already feeling the pressure. I didn’t even want to imagine what might’ve happened if we’d actually slept with each other.

I snorted into my empty bedroom. There were so many other scenarios that were likely to happen than us hooking up, that was for sure.

I stared at my phone, again trying to word a message nicely without coming across as clingy, and not like I wanted to see him again, but also not like I didn’t want to see him again… that I just wanted to get my brother’s clothes back, but I didn’t want him to just drop them by the next time he came to get Finn.

After deleting yet another message, I stared at my wall, trying to come up with a different way, but nothing sounded right. I couldn’t stop obsessing about it, couldn’t stop obsessing about Finn.

At least today had been an easy one with Dad, since he’d felt pretty good. He’d even sat outside for a bit to enjoy the sun and watch my mom in the garden. Maybe he’d get better after all. Then I could go back to college… maybe even to the one Finn went to. Not because Finn went there, of course, but because it was the closest one. It was where I’d gone before.

It had nothing to do with Finn.

Fuck.

This was all so fucked up, so completely nuts. I was losing my mind, fantasizing about a future with a man I’d only kissed once, who’d all but run away from me.

Frustrated with myself, I punched my pillow, trying to get rid of some of my emotions, but it didn’t help at all. It only made me feel worse, if anything — like I couldn’t control myself.

With one last deep sigh, I lay back down, pulling the blankets over myself. Time to get some sleep and stop thinking for just a little while. I had an early shift in the morning, and Dad would need me to help him get ready before I headed out.

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