Page 20 of It's Just You

“Uh, hi.” Finn stared at me like he knew exactly how fake my smile was. “I already ate, but I won’t say no to some coffee.”

“Sure. Come in.” I opened the door wider.

“Good morning!” Mom called out from the living room. Dad was obviously trying to smile, but it was more of a grimace, and I tried not to flinch.

“Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Stiles!” He glanced back at me and frowned. “Wait. I don’t need the coffee, actually. Are you eating breakfast right now?”

“Uh, no. I’m done.” Something about the way he’d spoken left me feeling like there was something else he wanted to say. “Why?”

“Come outside with me a moment?” Finn looked up at me with his beautifully made up eyes. His lips were full and painted, so soft, yet so undeniably belonging to a man now that I knew he was male. He stood close to me, almost too close.

I swallowed hard. What was it about him that kept calling to me?

“Sure. What’s up?” I stepped outside, closing the door behind me as my feet touched the welcome mat.

“I wanted to ask you something… but I’m not really sure how to word it.”

That sounded ominous. But I hated when people beat around the bush. “Just come out and say it.”

“I… It’s about your dad. Is he… okay?”

I froze. Even Sam had never asked about Dad’s health. He hadn’t even seemed to notice his own father’s issues. How was it that Finn had, from only one breakfast together?

Because he has eyes, a cynical part of my brain told me.

“He’s fine,” I lied, shrugging. It had gotten so much easier to lie over the past few years.

“Are you sure? I asked Sam, but he just shrugged. I don’t want to pry, but—”

“But nothing. He’s fine. Really.” I closed my eyes, ashamed, then opened them again without meeting Finn’s gaze. I didn’t want to lie to Finn. I didn’t want to lie to anyone. I wanted to just tell the truth, but Dad was so adamant about no one knowing.

He was afraid Sam would drop out of school like I had, but he was also afraid about how the neighbors would act, what other people might think of him… I had to respect his wishes, even if it was obviously starting to become clear to others that he wasn’t as okay as we all pretended he was.

“Okay.” He paused. “I’m here to talk to anyway. If there’s anything you ever want to say.”

I didn’t dare meet his eyes. He was already so keenly aware of his surroundings, of the people he was around, and I couldn’t risk him seeing through my facade even more. “Thanks. I appreciate it, but really, there’s nothing to talk about.”

“It’s okay, Kane. Really.”

His hand covered mine. Smaller, but not by a lot, which sort of surprised me. His skin was much better taken care of, though, soft where mine was callused and rough. Sparkling, glittering nail polish adorned his nails, and I was just so damn aware of his presence. His hand stayed on me, covering it, touching it — offering me support even though I’d just lied to him and we both knew it.

“Thank you.” I swallowed again, thickly. The pavement seemed to be much more interesting right now. I wanted to say more, but my throat was closed somehow.

“Shh. There’s no need to talk.” Finn kept his touch light, allowing me to pull back my hand if I wanted to… but I didn’t. That was the confusing part. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to pull away or not, if I wanted to talk or not. It threw me completely. Usually, if people thought I needed to talk, they pestered me more, not less, until I downright shut down.

I stood there for a moment with him in silence, completely unsure about what to do now.

Before I could figure it out, the door opened behind me, and Sam stood in the doorway. “Hey, what are you two doing outside? Is there some secret meeting I’m not allowed to be at?” Sam didn’t even bother with greeting Finn in general, just jumping into our moment with both feet. Finn let go of me, and I resented my brother a little for stealing his touch from me.

“Yes, a secret meeting about how to throw you into the lake because you can’t seem to shower on time.”

Sam huffed. “Like you needed me. Besides, Mom loves Finn, too. She’d have taken care of him.”

“Still rude, Sam, but I’m used to it,” Finn said with a long-suffering sigh. “Though Kane’s suggestion sounds good.” He laughed, taking the sting out of his words, as his hand went back to his side.

Sam didn’t seem to have noticed anything — sometimes how much he missed could be a good thing — then turned around to leave the porch. “Try getting me into the lake now, brother!” With that, he started running for his car, yelling, “C’mon, Finn!”

Finn raised an eyebrow, but he turned to follow Sam. “See you soon.” With that, he left, following my brother at a much slower pace.

Was that a promise? I couldn’t be sure at all, but I hoped it was.

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