Page 55 of Delicious Prey

“Kirill, what’s going on?”

His hands tighten around me, fingers digging into my flesh and when that’s not enough, he slides a hand into my robe and grabs my hip, keeping me pinned in place.

“I never leave witnesses,” he says, and his voice is so soft I have to strain to hear him.

“I know you don’t.” I say it slowly, feeling more nervous with each passing second, but it’s what he says next that has me frozen in place.

“Except for one time.”

“No,” I whisper, already shaking my head in denial. He tightens his grip on me when my body starts to tremble.

“I turned around and saw you standing there, and it was like my heart stopped in that moment, or maybe it’s more like it started beating for the first time. You were so beautiful and scared, but you didn’t scream and you didn’t run. You just looked at me and begged, and there was no way in hell I could shoot you. I could never hurt you, little bunny. I’m not capable of it.”

A deep keening sound pierces the air around us, and it takes several seconds for my brain to realize that it’s coming from me. I struggle against him, but he only holds me tighter.

“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so fucking sorry, but I didn’t know you. I had no idea he had a daughter or that you were even home. The first time I knew of your existence is when you turned the corner and saw me.”

“But why?” I yell at him. “Why did you kill him? He wasn’t rich or powerful enough to even attract your attention. I don’t understand.”

“He owed a lot of money at the casino he liked to go to, the casino that’s owned by one of Ivan’s mistresses. One night he got drunk and made a big scene after losing ten grand on one hand of cards. When Carla came out to speak with him, he screamed at her and called her a cheating bitch. She complained to Ivan, and I was quickly brought onboard to take care of the problem. After I was arrested, I told Vadim to pay off his debt so they wouldn’t come after you.”

“Am I supposed to thank you for that?” I try to pull back, but when he won’t let me go, I smack his chest, and then because it feels so damn good, I do it again and again. He lets me, doesn’t even try to fend off my pathetic slaps, and the hurt in his eyes is almost enough to make me feel bad for him. Almost. But then I remember my dad, I remember that night and how it had felt walking into that room and seeing his lifeless body and the terror I’d felt when I’d seen the gunman just standing there, looking at me. I’d had nightmares for two fucking years because of him. I’d lost a dad because of him, the only parent I had left, and then he’d let me fall in love with him, knowing the whole goddamn time that he’d killed my dad. No, fuck this.

“Let me go,” I holler at him.

“I can’t.”

I ignore the pain and sorrow in his voice.

“You can’t just keep me here, Kirill. I don’t want to be here with you anymore. I want to go.”

He hugs me against him, and even though my body stiffens, he holds me so fucking gently, like he’s scared I’m going to just disappear into thin air. Part of me wants so badly to just melt against him, to let him take care of me and comfort me, but I can’t do that. I can’t ignore the giant lie he’s let me believe this whole fucking time.

“I love you,” he groans. “I can’t let you go, Lydia. I love you too fucking much.”

I grit my teeth, ignoring the pain in my heart and force myself to lie and say, “But I don’t love you. Not anymore, Kirill. You’re a fucking lying monster, and I never want to see you again.”

He takes in a shaky breath at my words and I nearly lose my resolve when I feel the wet heat of his tears hit my cheek.

He lets out a pained groan. “I can’t take this, baby. Please don’t hate me. I swear we can work through this. I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you.” His wet cheek presses against mine. “I’ve never begged for anything in my life, but I’m begging you now. Please don’t do this.”

I make my voice hard as steel when I say, “I didn’t do this. You did.” I push away from him again, and this time he doesn’t stop me. With his shoulders slumped and the haunted look in his eyes, I can tell the fight has left him. He looks distraught, and I hate how much it hurts me to see it. “You broke my heart, Kirill,” I tell him, feeling it break all over again when he raises his stormy grey eyes to mine. “Open up the gate. I don’t want to be here anymore.”

He gives a slow shake of his head. “I can’t let you go.”

Tears still run down his face, and seeing it has me crying even harder. I can’t turn my heart on and off, no matter what he’s just told me, but that doesn’t mean I can stay here with him. I love him, and I know I will love him for the rest of my life, but I can’t think straight when he’s right in front of me. I don’t know what to do or where to go. All I know is that if I don’t get out of this fucking house right now, I’m going to lose it.

“Please, Kirill,” I say, and he lets out a disbelieving laugh that I’m willing to use his weakness against him. “I just need some space. I need some time to think, and I need you to trust me enough to give it to me.”

He reaches into his pocket and pulls his phone out, and when he punches in the code to open the gate, I let out the breath I’d been holding. “Take the Ferrari. It’s an automatic, and the keys are hanging in the garage.”

“Thank you,” I whisper and then start to step back into the bedroom, but he grabs my wrist, holding me in place, and when I look down at him, the anguish in his eyes cuts me to the quick.

“I’m sorry,” he says, his voice raw with emotion. “I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you. I wanted to, but I was terrified of losing you.”

“Why did you tell me now? Why not just keep it a secret?”

His thumb caresses my inner wrist, and just that one small touch has me wishing I could forget everything he just told me.

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