Page 63 of Titan

Gil: Is Theia still there?

It took her a few minutes to respond, and by that time, I was already leaving my flat to get in the car.

Remi: No, she left after her thing with you…

I checked the time as I got in the car. It was only nine. I’d booked a relatively early session with Theia, as I didn’t know how things would go.

Remi: Did you upset her? She didn’t seem like herself.

Unsurprisingly, Remi had got straight to the point. And now I felt even worse.

Gil: I think so, but I’m going to fix it.

Remi: I should hope so. Don’t fuck it up any further.

I threw my phone into the cupholder, turned the engine on and set off. What was going on between me and Theia was none of Remi’s fucking concern. I knew she was worried about Theia, but our relationship was our business.

What relationship is that, Gil?

The relationship I was going to build with her. We’d already laid the foundations. Now I had to stop being a fucking coward about the whole thing. If I wanted her, I had to go get her and make it clear my feelings towards her had changed. I wanted to explore them with her.

Some people might call me crazy for wanting someone like her with the job she did. It was her life. She’d been clear about what she did and didn’t do at the club. I wasn’t going to dictate shit to her about it. If that’s what Theia wanted to do, she had my full support.

My father had taken away my mother’s choice. He’d forced her to stay with him in the most brutal and permanent way. I would never do that to someone I cared about. It wasn’t in my nature. I might be a killer, but I wasn’t heartless or cruel. Not like Gennaro Villetti had been. I was beginning to see that now. It wouldn’t be an overnight process, but I had to separate the man he wanted me to be from the man I actually was inside.

You don’t have to be Gennaro Villetti… you can be Gilberto Villetti. It’s okay to be you. She sees you as Gil. So be him. Don’t let your past ruin your future.

I pulled up near Theia’s building, paid for parking, and made my way down the street. After running away from her at the club, I could only hope Theia would let me in. That she’d want to see me. I wouldn’t be a fuck up this time… at least, I hoped not. I didn’t know what would happen when I saw her, and whether I’d manage to get my words out about my true feelings towards the woman I’d become completely enamoured with.

Twenty Two

Theia

My hands rubbed my temples as I stared at the ceiling. The moment I got in after leaving the club, I’d taken a shower and changed into my pyjamas. I curled up under a blanket on my sofa and lay there in the quiet, semi-dark, wondering what the fuck had happened. My body was thrumming from the aftermath even now, but it didn’t stop me from being confused by his behaviour and actions.

When I went into work today, I’d only had one client on my schedule… Gil. Remi hadn’t acted like anything was amiss until she informed me it would occur in room ten, the voyeur room. I’d become immediately suspicious. And to be quite fucking honest, I was right to be on my guard.

The memory of his voice in my ear flooded my senses all over again. I put my hands over my eyes and cursed myself for feeling aroused by it. The only thing that had become clear to me was why Gil had asked me all those questions after my confession about my past. He wanted to know what I wanted. And he’d given it to me. Fuck, had he given me something precious and so fucking fulfilling… until it wasn’t any longer. Until he left me questioning everything between us.

Why on earth would he do something sexual with me when he wasn’t interested in me that way? He hadn’t mentioned anything changing between us. Sure, he’d flirted with me at the coffee shop, but I didn’t know if it was because he was more comfortable with me or something else.

The buzzer went for the door. I hauled myself up from the sofa and went over to the intercom. My heart almost stopped when I saw who was at the front door on the little camera. Not even thinking about it, I pressed down to let him up without even saying hello. Gil looked up at the camera for a second before he pushed the door open and walked in.

I stepped back and wrung my hands together. He was here. He was fucking here. Were we going to talk about what happened? I hadn’t been expecting him to turn up here. Not when he said he had to go. I assumed it was mafia stuff, but perhaps I’d been wrong.

The moment he knocked, I rushed over to the front door and pulled it open, completely forgetting I was only dressed in a baggy t-shirt and a pair of shorts. My hair was still damp from my shower.

Gil stood there with a pensive expression on his face. I didn’t say a word. The sight of him made my heart squeeze painfully in my chest. My hand went to it, rubbing the sore spot. His eyes darted to my movement, narrowing on my fingers before they darkened with an intensity that had me shivering on the spot.

Before I could do another thing, he stepped towards me, pulled the door from my free hand, and shoved it shut behind him. I was backed up against the wall a moment later. Gil’s hand went to my face, thumb skating over my jaw while his other curled around my back. I sucked in air when he pressed me against him.

“Theia,” he rumbled, the vibrations of his chest running right through me. “Non riesco a toglierti dalla mia testa.”

My mouth parted. I had no idea what he said, but the emotion in his voice almost fractured me in two. Had he spoken Italian to me? I don’t know why it surprised me Gil would be bilingual, considering I’d heard Zayn and Arlo using Italian to speak privately, but it did.

“Come with me,” he all but growled.

He stepped back, took a hold of my hand, and dragged me towards my bedroom. I didn’t stop him. I was so fucking undone by the fact he was here, I had no idea what to do with myself. Especially not when he released me by the end of my bed before his fingers were at the bottom of my t-shirt, pulling it up off my body. For some reason, I put my arms up to help him. My shorts and underwear came next, my clothes pooling on the floor below us.

---