Page 29 of Deserving Maddie

Chapter 14

"Youdon'tneedtokeep babysitting me." Maddie added an extra scoop of sugar to her coffee. She had a feeling she would need it. She slept like shit and she didn't have the level of energy needed to deal with her moody son.

Or nosy best friend, it would seem.

"After the bullshit you pulled last night, I would beg to disagree."

She should've known this was coming. Kat had been suspiciously quiet last night as they picked up the rental car and dropped Ray's vehicle off at his house. Luck was on her side when he wasn't home and she got away with leaving him a note.

"I'm not arguing with you about this. I made my decision. As my friend, I would think you would respect that."

She was tired of fighting with Kat about Ray. It broke her heart to leave that note. The last thing she wanted to do was create space between them, but she didn't see any other option. There was no future in which they ended up together. Not while Gabe and Charley needed her. And right now, they did more than anything.

"You know I respect your decisions. I have backed every one you've made, even when I disagreed with them. But as your friend, I think it's also important to let you know when you're making a mistake. Walking away from Ray is a mistake. A big one."

Maddie sucked in a big gulp of air and held it. She counted to five, and when that didn't work, she continued on until she hit fifteen. Kat meant well, and her best friend was right. Walking away from Ray was a big mistake. One she was sure she would regret the older she got. But she didn't see much of a choice.

"Please drop it. I'm begging you. This is hard enough for me already."

She didn't even realize she was crying until Kat was pushing off the stool and rushing toward her.

"I'm sorry," Kat fussed. "I didn't mean to make you cry. I just know how much you deserve this, and I hate to see you throw away a good thing."

That made her cry even more. She barely spent any time with Ray but it was obvious what a good man he was.

"I must've done something really bad in a past life to deserve all this."

"That's not true," Kat insisted. "You are one of the sweetest people I know. You worked your ass off to become the best damn lawyer, despite the obstacles Anthony tossed at you. And you did that with not only one, but two kids in tow. You might not see it right now, but things are pretty damn good. Just think what would've happened if Anthony had succeeded in convincing you not to finish college and be the stay-at-home mother he wanted you to be."

"I would be stuck in North Carolina, living off the insurance and death benefits, while trying to find any form of work to survive."

"Exactly. But you're not because you, my friend, are a badass who said screw it and followed her dream. You made sure you had a stable and amazing career that supports you and the kids. You make the tough choices even if it's uncomfortable because you know what is right for your family."

Kat's little pep talk made her feel better. Every decision she’d ever made was for her kids. It was true back in college when she chose to continue taking classes even though she was pregnant with Gabe, and when she opted to move halfway across the country.

Maddie needed to stop the little pity party she was having and start owning the decisions she made. They were for the best. And if they weren't, then she would deal with it, and do better the next time. What she wasn't going to do any longer was feel bad or guilty.

"You're right. I've always had to make the tough calls, and that's not going to change now that I'm on my own. Moving here was a tough call, but it was the right one. Leaving Ray was a mistake, but it's something I need to do for now. I can revisit the notion after I deal with Gabe, and Iwillbe dealing with him."

She sounded more confident than she felt.

"That's my girl. My nephew will appreciate it. He's only taking things out on you because you're letting him. You are his safe space right now. He just needs to realize that he can't treat you like crap in the process."

Speak of the devil.

She could hear her son stomping around above her.

"I better go start this new me right now, while I'm feeling the pep."

"You got this," Kat cheered her on.

With a real smile on her face, Maddie walked up the flight of stairs. Charley's room was first, so she decided to check in on her daughter. As usual, Charley was already awake and dressed.

"Good morning, sweetheart. Aunt Kat is down in the kitchen if you want to grab some breakfast with her."

"Okay." Charley tossed a book into her bookbag. "Just give me a second to make sure I have everything and then I'll head down."

Maddie noticed the lack of books on her daughter's nightstand. Charley loved to read and usually had at least a half dozen books to choose from.

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