Page 21 of Deserving Maddie

Her friend snagged the bottle and in under a minute had the cork out and two glasses of wine poured. Maddie wanted to say something snippy, but kept her mouth shut. The end result was the same. She had her glass of wine. Even if it meant her friend showed her up in the process.

"Yes, really."

She tried to sound confident, but knew what Kat would say even before her best friend spoke up.

"So, you mean he didn't just swoop in and save you like Superman?"

Ugh. Not the Clark Kent references again. It only reminded her just how sexy Ray really was.

It wasn't just Kat's words but also the raised eyebrow that had Maddie stumbling.

"I mean . . ."

"And he didn't just lend you his car because yours had a flat tire," Kat interrupted her. "Come on, Maddie. If that doesn't scream that he cares about you, then I don't know what does."

"That's the problem," she huffed just before she brought the wineglass up to her lips and took a very unladylike gulp.

"Oh, right, because a man who actually tries to take care of you is a bad thing."

She really didn't want to have this argument, but she knew well enough that Kat wouldn't be dropping the topic anytime soon.

"No, it's not a bad thing," she tried to defend her thoughts. "But did you not see Gabe's reaction? He hates Ray and would feel betrayed if I started anything serious. I can't do that to my children." She finished the rest of her glass and poured herself another. "I can't do that to Gabriel. Not after I forced him to move here against his wishes. He already believes I ruined his life."

She would have to wait to start seeing anyone new. It wasn't fair, but putting her son first was always her priority. Suppose Gabe didn't like the person she dated? Then there would be no future with them. It was as simple as that.

"I love my nephew dearly, but he doesn't control your love life and I don't think his anger is towards Ray. I think he's mad in general and taking it out on him."

"Exactly." She tipped the wineglass in her friend's direction. "He's angry, and I refuse to make it worse. Ray is kind and clearly a caretaker. He doesn't deserve my level of crazy, so when I return the car, that's it. I'm going to tell him I can't do it. I refuse to hurt him, and I'm not built for a no-strings-attached kind of deal. I thought I was, but no."

The thought of never having Ray touch her again was like a lead weight sitting in her stomach. It felt wrong on so many levels.

In another life, she could see them having a great relationship. Ray was everything she should've been looking for in a man.

"What happened to my fearless best friend?" Kat raised her brow. "The one who promised after Anthony's death that she would live her life to the fullest and never let another man control her happiness?"

Pain shot through her heart.

"That woman was foolish. She didn't understand the reality of the decision she made."

"You deserve happiness."

She did her best to plaster a huge smile on her face.

"I am happy. The kids make me happy, and I'm free of Anthony. I know it might not seem like it, but for the first time in years, I'm happy. Sure, it would've been nice to see where things could've gone with Ray, but maybe this is the universe's way of telling me it's not meant to be."

"You don't really believe that."

Damn her best friend for seeing right through her.

"You're right, I don't believe it, but it doesn't change anything. If Ray really is the man I think he is, then he'll understand. I don't expect him to wait for me, but maybe after Gabe graduates, then we can see where things take us. But in the meantime, I'm going to do my best to get a handle on this single-parenting gig and try desperately to make my son see I didn't screw his life up when we moved to Texas."

"You're a stronger woman than anyone gives you credit for, Maddie. That includes me."

Maddie took another sip of wine and stared into the red liquid. She didn't have a choice but to be strong. Gabe and Charley deserved the best of her. And she would give them that. One day she would have the luxury of dating again, but now wasn't that time.

Chapter 11

Raygrabbedthefilehe compiled on the motorcycle club and made his way to the situation room. Nancy had called to let him know that the police officer who was handling the death of the MC president was being escorted through the building by Arlo.

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