Page 61 of A Childhood Crush

Isat on the edge of the unfamiliar bed, feeling like a complete stranger in someone else’s home. It had only been a week since I walked out on Luke, but the guilt and regret were already starting to settle in. I wondered if I might have overreacted a bit. I should have heard him out. I missed Luke like I would miss oxygen underwater. Not having him with me felt like an actual wound that wouldn’t heal. It was painful.

I couldn’t count the number of times I had reached for my phone to call him. All I had to do was call him. I was sure he would want to talk to me, but I supposed I was afraid of what would happen if he didn’t. That would mean it was really over. I wasn’t quite ready to accept that.

Julia was an absolute sweetheart. I called her and asked if I could crash at her place for the night. Hunter and Julia had welcomed me into their house and insisted I stay in their guest bedroom. I barely knew the couple, and yet here I was, imposing on their kindness because I couldn’t bear to face my own reality. It was all too much to handle. I didn’t want to believe Luke betrayed me but there were so many signs.

As I sat there in silence, I couldn’t help but think about everything I had left behind. The good times, the laughter, the love—all gone in an instant. I felt a knot forming in my stomach as I tried to make sense of my thoughts. How did I end up here? Was it all my fault? Would I ever be able to forgive myself for walking away?

I took a deep breath and pulled myself together. Lena and Caroline were coming over to do something or other for the wedding. I didn’t even know what it was. Every night had been one task or another. I had a feeling these sudden tasks were strategically planned to keep me busy. I appreciated it. It did help to stay busy.

I got a text from Izzy checking in on me and asking if she could come by. I was excited to see her. I answered the door, accepting her warm hug. “How are you?” she asked.

“Sad,” I answered.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“Come in.” I opened the door wider. “Julia just ran out.”

“Wow, this place is incredible,” she said, peering around.

“It is nice.” I smiled.

“Are you doing okay?” she asked.

“No, but I’m alive and I guess that’s the most I can hope for,” I muttered.

We sat in the living room and were talking when Julia and Lena came in.

“Hey!” Julia greeted.

“Julia, this is my cousin, Izzy,” I introduced. “Izzy, this is Julia and Lena.”

“Hi,” the twins answered.

“Caroline is on her way over,” Julia said. “I picked up Chinese and wine.”

“I should go.” Izzy went to stand.

“No, stay,” Julia said. “The more the merrier.”

“I don’t want to crash your party,” Izzy said.

“You are not crashing,” Julia assured her.

An hour later, we were all sitting in the living room, sipping on wine and admiring the bride-to-be’s dress. She had picked it up from the shop and was showing all of us. It was classy and beautiful, and I was so envious. I didn’t know if I would ever get the chance to wear a wedding dress and marry the man of my dreams.

“That dress is so perfect for you,” Julia said. “So much better than the first time.”

“The first time?” Izzy asked.

Caroline groaned. “Leo saved me from my first almost-marriage.”

“Saved you?” Izzy laughed. “Did he kidnap the bride?”

“Technically, the bride walked out on her cheating fiancé,” Caroline replied.

“And right into the arms of her mortal enemy.” Lena grinned.

“Caroline and Leo hated each other,” I explained to Izzy. “I was in charge of making sure they were never in the same room. They really, really, didn’t like each other.”