Page 91 of Until Now

“We still haven’t talked about what happened.”

“What did happen, Piccola?” I’m not sure I can tell him. But, this is supposed to be about honesty, right? He can’t get too mad if I’m honest. “Don’t you think you guys should talk about it?”

“There’s a lot to talk about. Especially if he is who I think he is. I don’t understand why he wouldn’t have told me. But, a lot is going on right now, his dad was in the hospital—”

“L’ospedale?”

“Jimmy had a heart attack.”

“Is he okay? Nick, I mean.”

“We had dinner not long ago, he’s coping, but—”

“You had dinner?” He is rightfully confused. “You had dinner, but you haven’t talked about things?”

“He just needed a friend.”

“Siete amici?”

“We’re trying.”

“But, don’t you think you should talk things over before you put a label on it? What if you want more than just friends, or what if he decides he wants something you don’t?”

“We’ll talk. When the time is right.”

“The time will never be right, Davina.” He covers my hands. “Take it from me, there is no right time. You need to talk to him. I want you to be happy, and if that’s him, then I want you guys to figure this out.” He smiles at me. “I will always love you, Davina. Even when you do things I don’t agree with or understand. Sei ancora la mia bambina.”

Tears brim my eyes, for the first time, it feels like things are going to work out.

“I am sorry for how I reacted. I love you very much and I know things haven’t always been easy, but we’re gonna get through it.”

“Thanks, Daddy.”

“Now, one more question.” He squares his shoulders and looks me straight in the eye. “Do you love him?”

I’m taken aback. “What?”

“It’s a serious question, Nina.”

“Does it matter?”

“Of course, it matters.”

I’m hesitant. There is no going back once I cross this line, when I finally say it out loud. “I mean, it feels different. Non lo so.”

“It is different, because you love him.”

“But, Lee—”

“You didn’t love Lee, Piccola. Not in the same way.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Well, that’s up to you, isn’t it?”

§

I end the FaceTime with one of my past clients in Nashville. They just sold their home and are in desperate need of help on a fixer-upper they just purchased in its place. Opening my email, I ask Andrew if he is available November 1st for a flight to Nashville. If it was up to me, we would leave in the morning, but I know my clients would rather spend Halloween with their kids than going over design ideas.

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