Page 27 of The List of Things

He’s very good at this cheesy romantic thing.

“Isn’t that the whole point?” I don’t answer, still waiting on his. “Why do you think Leah and I broke up?” He asks me, pushing off of the railing, releasing me from his grasp.

I move, putting distance between me and the railing once again, “Because she hits you a lot and acts like everyone owes her something.”

“I mean that wasn’t the reason, but it is true... Leah broke up with me believe it or not. She said I spent too much time playing football and I didn’t give her enough attention while I was on the field,” He tells me, and I furrow my brows.

“On the field? While you’re playing?” I ask, and he shrugs.

“She was cheering on the sidelines… She expected more attention. Ryn, it makes no sense to me either, but I just let it go. She wasn’t the greatest girlfriend. A week after she broke it off she started trying to start something back up, she told her friends she only broke up with me to show them she was serious... I don’t know. She probably thought I’d beg her to stay, or something like that. It’s all stupid... Dating her in general was stupid of me. We didn’t fit well,” His words relieve stress from my shoulders.

“So I’m not jeopardizing anything right now between the two of you?”

He chuckles, “If I was trying to get my ex back I would have never agreed to this… And this isn’t some ploy to make her jealous either... I do that by speaking to you, I didn’t have to take you out to do that. Leah and I are done… You don’t have to worry.”

I shrug and look down.

“Wasn’t worried,” I brush off his comment, walking back to the bench, an island appearing, the boat closing in on the port.

Even if he was trying to make her jealous he would never admit to that, especially not on our first fake date. That would be a horrible way to start all of this. I’m sure a part of him likes the thought of it. Making Leah mad.

“So if you found the perfect girlfriend, the perfect person for you, and she said the same thing that Leah did would that change anything? If Leah didn’t break it off with you would that have changed things with you and how much time you dedicated to football?” I ask, wondering where his head is at.

I know how good he is at the sport, but how serious is he?

“No, nothing would change that. Football is the first love I’ve ever had, it makes me who I am. I’m not giving up who I am for another person. I won’t do it ever, football comes first. If she or anyone else truly loves me they wouldn’t make me choose,” His explanation is mature, but also shocking.

For someone as obsessed with romance as Bellamy claims he is, he’s far more obsessed with his sport.

“So you’d marry your relationship with football if you couldn’t find the right person?” I ask.

“I’m already married to football. Whoever I find is going to have to join the marriage, and they’re going to have to be okay with it,” He shrugs and it’s obvious he’s set in this decision.

His dedication is intense, almost overwhelming. Leah was jealous of football. She seems like the jealous type too.

I’m the perfect person to make her jealous if that is his goal. Leah and I are complete opposites while also being the same in odd ways. Leah is stunning, blonde, with the perfect cute features. She’s cute and sweet. We’re different because Leah has a venomous side she doesn’t show. I let mine reign free. She’s the kind of girl you can bring home to your mother. I’m the kind of girl guys keep a secret from their parents. My black hair, and dark makeup as well as the showy clothes I wear are enough to send red flags flying. Leah has always been fake to me because Leah doesn’t approve of my extracurriculars. Most of the cheerleaders aren’t fans of me because of what I do in the bedroom.

I grab my bag and try not to think about his words but I can’t help but ponder them. He follows me as the boat slows, and we move down the stairs, I hold onto the railing. He keeps me steady, his hand on my lower back as I step. It’s safe with him. That’s something I’m realizing. He makes every right move to make me feel comfortable. I realize there’s so much intimacy in feeling safe in someone else’s energy… and that’s what I feel with him. It’s an underrated feeling.

The boat comes to a stop, and the crew helps dock us, making the boardwalk for us to get off and go onto the island. We shuffle our way to the exit, the rest of the passengers moving too. Once we reach the exit there’s a small gap between the boat and the boardwalk. Bellamy walks over the edge, and I look at the gap. He turns back before I even say a word and he holds his hand out. I look at his hand, ignoring the flip of my stomach, and I place my hand in his.

He leans over, taking my hip in his free hand, lifting me over the gap, making sure I put no effort in whatsoever. I watch him carefully now that I’m standing next to him. He just keeps on walking, his large hand swallowing mine whole as we continue onto the island. As much as I hate to admit it, this is the greatest first date I’ve ever had, and it’s not even over yet.

CHAPTEREIGHT

CLOSER BY TEGAN AND SARA

He holdsmy hand the entire way as we walk toward the restaurants on the island, and he seems like he has no intention of letting it go. It’s darker now, but the sun hasn’t fully disappeared from the sky yet. He keeps me close to him as we walk, looking in shop windows, our words escaping only every now and then. There’s still a bit of tension in my body, the feeling of his so close, but so far all at once.

He’s bigger than me in every way. He overpowers me, but somehow I feel like we fit as we walk together. This is all very simple. Walking with him is simple, and I know the tension I feel is only in my head. But, the simplicity of it all is what makes my head spin, how casual and normal all of this feels. I have no doubt he feels nothing right now, he’s just here, and he’s enjoying his time... That’s the difference between us.

“Is this okay?” He asks, nodding his head to a small pizza restaurant.

I nod my head, and he pushes the door open, a small bell sounding. He leads me through the door with his hand, letting mine go as I walk in. He follows behind, his hands moving over the tops of my bare shoulders and down my arms as he follows behind me to the counter. I lean back slightly, looking up at him over my shoulder.

“I’ll take… Hawaiian but add banana peppers,” I tell the man behind the counter.

The man working doesn’t think anything of it, but Bellamy makes a short noise that makes me look back at him.

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