Page 156 of Unravel Me

“Right, well, let me give you one last thing.” He stops and pulls me back to him, pausing to look at his watch. 4:28 p.m., it says, right on track for this late-fall Vancouver sunset, and Adam smiles. “I need you to close your eyes for me.”

My chest pulls taut, and I shake my head. “I’m scared.”

Connor touches my nose. “Mama no scare.”

“I should be brave?” I ask him quietly.

He nods. “Mama bwave.”

“Okay. I’ll be brave, but only because it’s easy to be brave with you two beside me.”

Adam’s fingers lace through mine, a tender squeeze that urges my eyes closed. Gently, he leads me forward, and when we stop again, I grip his hand so hard I’m afraid I might cut off fingers he may or may not need in order to catch pucks; I’m still not totally sure of the logistics of hockey.

While I wait, my heart thuds a quick, unsteady beat, a buzz of electricity that pulses through me, to the tips of my fingers and all the way down to my toes. I breathe in the fresh air, listen to the sound of birds singing overhead, twigs snapping and rustling leaves, and hundreds of memories flood my brain. Memories of times so long ago, spent in places just like this, where the two people who loved me more than anything showed me how to appreciate nature, how to fall in love with the way it grounds you, makes every worry seem so small.

Sometimes life has a funny way of reminding you that the permanence of death isn’t quite as all-encompassing as we believe it to be. That despite the lack of physical evidence, the people we part ways with are never all that far. That they linger with us, show up sometimes at the strangest, most inconsequential moments.

Because as I finish smiling at the thought of my parents, at the moment Adam’s lips touch my ear, whispering for me to open my eyes, I’m graced with the most magnificent view, one I’ve waited over half my life to see.

In a plush forest of deep green, vibrant colors dance with the swaying trees, glitter down below in the running river, twinkle against the purple and coral sunset, and wind like glowing vines around a bridge I’d given up walking along.

For my twenty-fifth birthday, Adam is giving me the gift my parents couldn’t deliver on my twelfth birthday. But more than that, he’s giving me them. There’s nothing I feel more right now than the certainty that my parents are right here at my side, that they’ve never left.

Speechless, I stare out at the Capilano Suspension Bridge, the river and the trees, the millions of twinkly lights that make this day glow. And when I look into Adam’s eyes, it’s not just the lights that dance in them, but the same love my parents showered me with, day in and day out. A silent tear runs down my cheek at the powerful feeling, so palpable I lean into it, close my eyes, and drink it in.

Adam catches my tear with his thumb. “I know this was supposed to be something special you and your parents did together, and I can’t replace that, but I thought…” He gestures behind me, and I turn to see all our friends join us next to Olivia and Carter. Archie and Marco, Garrett and Jennie, Cara and Emmett, and Jaxon. “I thought this family might be a decent runner-up.”

“Please say yes,” Carter whispers over my shoulder. “My ego can’t take the hit.”

“Your ego is big enough to take at least a hundred hits before it’s in danger,” I whisper back, sniffling.

“Damn it, she knows me too well already.”

I wipe the tears from my eyes. “You guys are here for me?”

“Where else would we be?” Archie asks.

Cara smiles. “We’re family, Rosie. We show up for each other.”

Jennie slaps at her cheeks. “I’m not crying, FYI. It’s just, you’re crying, and the lights are super pretty, and I love birthdays, and-and…” She chokes on a quiet sob as Garrett rubs her back. “I have really bad allergies.”

Adam grips my hand. “I mentioned we love super hard in this family, right? Any more and it’d be downright suffocating.”

Suffocating? But it’s the opposite. These people, the way they love so openly and without limits, it’s so goddamn refreshing. I’ve been searching my entire life for these people, for this kind of love, and I didn’t just find it in one person; I found it in a whole group of them. Surrounding myself with their love is like coming up for air at the last moment, having life breathed back into you.

I think about it all night, as we wander the lit trails, have hot chocolate above the river, as we talk and laugh and enjoy every moment together. And when Adam and I are lying in bed later that night, all I want to do is say thank you.

I run my fingers through the dark smattering of curls on his chest, stuff my leg between his, desperate to be as close as possible to my person as his fingertips trail down my back.

“Can I tell you something?” I murmur into the silence of the night.

Midnight eyes fall to mine, a handsome, lazy smile hooking the corner of his mouth. “Anything, gorgeous girl.”

“Earlier tonight, you said you wanted to give me something I’ve always wanted. But I already have that, Adam, because I have you. You gave me you. And I’ve always wanted you, even before I knew you. My heart knew you were out there, that we’d find you one day.” I skim his jaw, fingers sliding into his hair as I guide his mouth to mine. “How lucky am I to have my dreams come true?”

“Am I really your dream?” he whispers against my lips. “Promise?”

“Swear it.”

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