Page 61 of Always Yours

“No, I wouldn’t,” I retort. “But when my friend, whom I care about, wanted to forget about someone who hurt her, I was down. I was young, I was horny, and you were offering. How could I say no?”

“You took advantage of me. Just as you intend to take advantage of Austen.”

I glare. “I have no such intentions, at all. We’re friends. And as for you, Shelli, you used me just as much as you assumed I used you.”

She balks at that. “I would never.”

“But you did,” I insist, holding her gaze. “You wanted to forget Aiden, you wanted a distraction, and I gave you one. Just as much fun as I had, you had the same, and you can’t hold something like that over me.”

“You fucked me and then told me you loved me,” she snaps at me. “How am I not supposed to think that means something? And then you left for Russia the next day!”

“I told you I loved you because I wanted you to know I cared and I felt good about what we did. I wasn’t guilty or embarrassed. It’s not my fault you forgot I was leaving. And listen, maybe we would have kept hooking up. But honestly, you were so in love with Aiden, I knew I didn’t matter.”

Something shifts in her eyes. “But you did matter.”

“Shelli,” I urge, meeting her gaze, “you have always only loved Aiden, and I knew that going in. I was okay with it, really. I wasn’t upset, and I’m still not. Sometimes a guy likes to be used, especially by someone like you.”

“I didn’t intend on using you,” she says, her eyes troubled.

“It honestly doesn’t matter,” I say, shrugging. “It’s all in the past.” When she doesn’t say anything, I reach out, taking her hands. “I’m sorry for any misunderstanding, Shelli. I never wanted to hurt you or ever make you assume something. To this day, I still care very deeply for you. You’ll always be very important to me.”

“But I tried to keep you off the team.”

“I know.”

She looks from our hands to my eyes. Tears swirl in her bright-blue depths, and my heart catches. “I don’t deserve your apology. I think I made the situation more than it was.”

“You did. And the apology isn’t for you, it’s for me. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

She nods slowly. “I’m sorry for holding a grudge for so long. I am very prideful.” She’s got that right. “It doesn’t help that my hormones are all over the place, and I had to go off my anxiety meds for the baby—which is no excuse whatsoever, but I’m not myself lately.”

“See, for me, it’s easy to accept that apology. You’re spoiled as fuck, Shelli. But at the end of the day, you’ve grown into an incredible, powerful woman.”

“I forgave you. You don’t have to kiss my ass,” she teases, and I grin. “I think we need to start over.”

“We can.”

She holds out her hand. “I’m Shelli Adler-Brooks, and I am your GM. I’m excited to see how far you go in our camp.”

I take her hand, thinking this is dumb as hell, but as long as she’s happy, I’ll do it. “Dimitri Titov. I’ve waited my whole life to play for the Assassins.”

“Yet you wasted your time in the Russian league,” she retorts, and I scoff.

“My dad wanted to be with his family, my grandma had really bad cancer when it was time for me to draft, and I didn’t want to leave them. I don’t regret a thing either. For me, family is everything.”

She looks very uncomfortable. “I didn’t know that.”

“No one does. I don’t even think Elli does,” I whisper as my heart clenches in my chest. We haven’t told anyone except for immediate family. “I didn’t want to stress my parents out by leaving for the States.”

“That’s completely understandable,” she says, swallowing hard. “Thanks. I feel like a jackass.”

“You should.” I wink with a chuckle. “Thankfully, she’s doing very well now.”

She smiles widely at me, her eyes bright and no longer carrying that resentment. I don’t know if she’s really over it, but I did my part. I tried. Neither of us says anything for a long time. We just stand uncomfortably with each other, and I know, for me, I’m trying to find the words I want to say. I’m not sure there are any until Shelli looks up at me.

“There is a rumor you and Austen have a thing going on.”

I keep my face blank. “There isn’t any way in hell I’m entertaining that conversation.”

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