Page 3 of Always Yours

I take the opportunity to look at her. Her eyes look tired, and I know she’s not resting like she’s supposed to be. I’m glad she went out with Natalie and her friends last night, but it looks as if she’s paying for it today. I take in the expanse of her belly, and my hands itch at my sides, wanting to touch her. Her long red hair curls down her back, and even now after all these years, she takes my breath away. She’s always been beautiful to me, and I hate that she’s self-conscious now that she’s put on weight. She doesn’t realize that she’s beautiful this way too.

Ally finally walks over to me after straightening up her station. “Hey, Austin, my schedule is full today. My next appointment should be here any moment. You want me to see if Olivia or someone has an opening?”

I get up from my seat and stand to my full height. “I’m your next appointment.”

She looks down at her phone in her hand and then back at me. “You’re Kennedy?” She shakes her head and gestures toward her station. “Why did you book it under your middle name?”

I wait until I’m seated before I respond. “Because I thought you would find a way to cancel my appointment or something if you knew it was me. You’ve been avoiding me.”

Her cheeks turn pink, and she looks guilty as she peeks at me in the mirror. “I haven’t been avoiding you.”

She grabs the apron and lays it over me, securing it at my neck. I keep my gaze fixed on her in the mirror. “You have been, and I’m trying not to take it personally and to give you time…”

She starts to speak, and when she sees the curious gazes from those around us, she leans in, her back to the room, and says what she has to say so low that I have to strain to hear her. “Give me time? You’re telling everyone that we’re getting married and this is your baby.:.”

She puts her hand to her stomach protectively, and I don’t fight off the urge any longer. I reach my hand out and cover her hand with my own, curling my fingers around hers. “Ally, I know you hate it when I try to tell you what to do, so I’m going to ask you. Will you please marry me and will you please let me be the father to your baby?”

She gasps and bites on to her lower lip. She wants to say yes, I know she does, but I also know that she’s not going to give in so easily. She’s already shaking her head. “I can’t, Austin. You know I can’t.”

I hate to be told no, and I don’t have to hear it often, but coming from Ally, it sucks even more. “I know you can. All you have to do is say yes.”

She raises up and steps away from my touch. Her hand feathers through my hair, and then she nudges me on the shoulder. “Come on, let’s wash it.”

She walks away, and I get up to follow her. She’s washed my hair every two weeks for the last few years so I know the drill. I get into the chair and lean back. I suck in a breath as she leans over me, her pregnant belly pushed into my shoulder. “I’m not done with this conversation, Ally.”

She smiles at me, and it’s the first real smile I’ve seen on her face in a while. “I know you’re not. Trust me, I know we’ll probably talk this to death, but can we do it somewhere else?”

She lifts her eyes and looks around the room, but my eyes never leave her face. I know what she sees. Everyone is watching us. It’s like this everywhere we go, and I know a lot of it has to do with the fact that I’ve made sure to tell anyone that will listen that Ally and I are getting married. Honestly, it wouldn’t be that big of news since we’ve always been seen together. I’m sure half the town thought we’d end up together anyway. No, the reason they stare is because Ally is still without a ring, and it looks as if she’s not going to be giving in any time soon.

“Fine, we can talk about it later. What time do you get off?”

She’s washing my hair, and I try to ignore the way her hands feel on me. When she doesn’t answer, I ask her again. “What time? I’ll bring over dinner.”

She’s shaking her head again. “Actually, I have plans this afternoon.”

She’s cagey, looking at everything but me again. “Plans? What kind of plans?”

She shrugs. “Just plans.”

I grip the sides of my chair a little tighter. “A date?”

Finally, she looks at me and starts to laugh. I swear she even snorts a little bit. “Really? A date? Have you looked at me lately? No, I don’t have a date.”

I’m quiet as she finishes washing my hair. I want to ask her more about her plans, but I don’t. At one time, we told each other everything, but now she’s keeping more and more to herself. It sucks, but lately, I can’t seem to reach her.

She finishes rinsing my hair and leans me up to towel it dry. I walk over to her station and take a seat. She goes about combing my hair, and because I can’t stop myself, I reach for her hand to hold her in place. Her eyes fix on mine, and I say the thing I’ve been thinking, the thing I probably shouldn’t. Something that I’ve kept to myself for a long time. “I have looked at you, Ally, and just because you’re pregnant, it doesn’t make you any less desirable. If anything…” I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. “If anything, you’ve always been sexy, but seeing you like this just brings out something in a man. So yeah, the idea of you having a date is not outrageous. I just hope if you plan on dating someone, well, I hope it’s me.”

Her eyes widen, and when I get it all out, her breath is coming out in little pants. She’s speechless, and when she continues to just stare at me, it almost feels like a rejection of sorts. I release my hold on her hand but keep my eyes glued on hers. “Austin… I…” She starts and stops, and it’s obvious that I’ve made her uncomfortable. Maybe I’m doing this all wrong. Maybe she doesn’t want to tie herself to me.

I force my eyes to the mirror in front of us. “It’s okay, Ally. We can talk later.”

“But…” she starts, and when she doesn’t say anything else, I find her gaze and force a smile to my face. “It’s fine, really. I know this isn’t the place for us to talk about everything.”

She inhales deeply and nods her head. “Right. You’re right, of course. So you want the same?”

I know she’s talking about my hair, and I nod my head. She gets to work, and I get lost in thought, thinking of all the things I want. The truth is, I don’t want anything to be the same. I wish we could be different. I want more than her friendship. I want the right to touch her, hold her, and tell her that everything’s going to be all right. I want to be the one she depends on. I want to be the one she loves. But right now, with the strained silence between us, I’m beginning to wonder if our friendship is going to even make it through this.

Chapter3