Page 40 of The Lost Child

Don’t lie. You disobeyed back in the cave.

I shook away the lies. Canavar was good; he listened. Obey, kill, eat. It was the only way.

The smell of blood filled my nostrils, so I sprinted the rest of the way down the dark passageway, my nose trained to Nerissa’s scent. When I stumbled out into a large, cavernous space, I saw the blood wasn’t from her, but the other witch. Good.

My feet took me to stand behind Nerissa protectively as she watched the witch, entranced. “Ssh, she is showing me blood magick. Stay here.”

The witch was inside a small circle of white rocks, her eyes closed. There was an empty circle next to her, which Nerissa stepped into. I growled, and she shot me a look. “Canavar,stay.”

Obey.

I sat down on my haunches moodily, settling in to watch. Nerissa was nothing like the master; she fed me, and her commands weren’t really commands. Perhaps she simply didn’t know how to command me properly, and the master hadn’t taught her yet. That would explain her confusion, and why she healed me.

Since she had already fed me, I must obey. Kill would be next. The thought lightened my burdened mind, providing me with focus and a bit of direction. I kept my muscles loose while I waited, ready to jump into action if this witch hurt Nerissa.

“Close your eyes and center yourself. Once that’s done, use the dagger.”

I watched carefully as the witch let out a deep breath, then picked up a dagger with a long, white blade. Moving carefully, she turned her left arm over and slit a short line across it. Blood flowed easily down into the circle, and I felt an odd tingle in the air around us. I gave off a rumbling warning in my chest, but there was no enemy to see. Just that odd feeling that something was happening, even if there was nothing.

Nerissa better not hurt herself in this manner,I thought. She was a fighter like me, but not as big and strong and still recovering from the ocean. If they needed blood, she could always use mine.

I took a step forward, but her command rang in my head.Stay.My wings twitched in irritation. I was a good fighter. I would prove it to her by listening.

Even if I wanted to do nothing more than hold her tightly to make sure she didn’t injure herself again. My hands balled into tight fists as Nerissa bent down to clasp a second knife, bringing it up and exposing the soft flesh of her under arm like the other had.

I wanted to jump in and rip it away from her, but the odd feeling in the air gave a warning buzz. Master didn’t believe in such things, but I recognized it—even if I wasn’t too sure about it myself.

Magick.

At the thought of the master, a bolt of unease went through me. He would be expecting me back soon. What would he do if I refused to return? Master always had a plan; that meant Nerissa must have one as well. Perhaps her plan was to befriend these witches and learn their magick, then kill them and return? It sounded like something the master would do.

And yet … it didn’t feel right.

These women had given Nerissa a safe place to sleep, with soft furs and hot tea for her throat that had been scratched raw from the salt of the ocean. They’d shared their clothing and hot cakes. Well, they’d also tied me down. But I think they were just trying to help Nerissa.

I think.

Such generosity was weak,I thought, but the voice wasn’t mine. It was the master’s.

Master doesn’t make mistakes,I argued back. If that was true though, why had I disobeyed him about Nerissa? I’d thrown away his words and plans to keep her safe, to keep her from being beaten like he beat me. Did that mean I was wrong, and the plan to hurt Nerissa was right?

No, that couldn’t be right. I refused to believe it.

Then maybe … just maybe, this kindness of the witches wasn’t a weakness. Maybe it was simply kindness. Nerissa’s kindness had been the spark that had sent me down this new path of ideas and … independent thought. Had that been her intent? Why were people kind?

I thought back to when I fed Nerissa. I viewed it as necessary and not kindness, but when the situation had been reversed I had to admit itwasbeing kind.

It had felt good to take care of her; to feed her. It was pleasurable to me, even.

The idea was shocking: pleasure for the sake of pleasure? I was often pleased when I pleased the master. Was it similar for the witches? I imagined killing someone who was about to hurt Nerissa, or bringing her a fresh kill to eat with my bare hands. Even though it was only a thought, my chest and wings puffed up just imagining her smiling at me.

Pleasuring others brought you pleasure.

Nerissa had fed me and healed me on her own. The master hadn’t told her to. Well, at first anyway. That must mean she wished to please me! And just this morning, I had awoken to her rubbing against me in a way that sent my instincts reeling. Oh, how I longed to dig my teeth into her neck and taste her blood—

What? No!

I shook my head hard, horrified I’d had any thoughts of hurting Nerissa. My forehead went tight, pain blossoming as I kept stood. I could only stare helplessly as Nerissa hurt herself—on purpose, no less—and the blood began to flow just as quickly as the witch’s. The witch spoke calmly to Nerissa as they both bled; directions and tips, telling her where to cut and how deeply or lightly. It didn’t seem difficult.

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