Page 18 of Surrendering the Skies

“Geneva.” His voice held hints of a quaver she’d never heard before. “Not now, okay?”

Slowly, she turned around, deflated. Anguish clawed at her heart when she saw the expression on his face. “You’re right,” she said. “I’m sorry.”

Ash folded back the covers on the bed and climbed beneath them. After extinguishing the lights, she joined him, wrapping her arms around his body. He buried his face in the crook of her neck, his shoulders shaking with his muffled sobs. As she stroked his hair and held him close in the darkness, Geneva desperately hoped for a way to make everything in their world feel right again.

Chapter Nine

Cool, fresh air filled Geneva’s lungs as she rounded the curve of the road and increased her speed, sprinting toward her destination. The morning sun trickled through the surrounding trees, illuminating the bright white siding of the house. She ran up the steps to the front porch and leaned against one of the posts to catch her breath. Raising one arm, she checked the device on her wrist for the elapsed time and total mileage from her run around the neighborhood. “Good enough,” she mumbled to herself.

The front door opened. Ash ambled outside, holding a steaming mug in one hand and a frosty glass of water in the other. “I thought I heard you,” he said, passing her the cold glass. “For someone who claimed to be traveling light, I’m impressed you remembered to throw your gym clothes and sneakers into the bag.”

“You know me, I’m a creature of habit.” She flashed a grateful smile before taking a gulp of the ice water. “I tried not to wake you when I left. I’m glad you managed to get some sleep.”

“Me, too.” He stepped to the side and nodded toward the open door. “I hope you’re hungry, because your mother arranged a food delivery that could feed the entire crew of our ship and then some.”

Geneva chuckled. “Sounds about right.”

“However,” he said as he waved her inside, “if you want any of the best stuff, you’d better get in there fast. I saved you a seat.”

“Can’t I shower first?”

“Nope.” He grabbed her hand and tugged her down the hallway. “Come on, everyone’s waiting to offer their thanks for the food and tell you embarrassing stories about me.”

She offered some half-hearted resistance. “Ash, I’m all sweaty and gross.”

“No one cares, I promise.” His grip on her tightened. “Besides, I know we don’t have a lot of time before you have to head back to your shuttle.”

The reminder of her impending departure made her relent. She allowed him to lead her into the kitchen, where an expansive array of food and a sea of smiling faces welcomed her. Ash pulled out a chair for her and she sat down as she greeted the rest of his family in return. The scene before her warmed her heart, and she admired their ability to find comfort in and enjoy each other’s company in the wake of such a distressing event. Reaching beneath the table, she gave Ash’s knee an affectionate squeeze before taking a plate and joining the conversation.

***

Upon her return to the ship, Geneva waited for the familiar sense of relief and contentment to wash over her. It never came. She completed her assigned tasks and supervised her team, but no matter what she was instructed to do, it felt like she was merely going through the necessary motions. Something was missing; something had changed. She searched for the spark, the relentless passion that used to drive her forward, but came up empty-handed.

When Ash came back from leave, she thought the situation might change for the better. Even though she was thrilled to have him back in their shared quarters, the enthusiasm for work-related activities still eluded her. She loved being with him and near him, but she’d realized such love could exist outside of their jobs.

As she lay wide awake at night, nestled in the comfort of his arms with his rhythmic breaths drifting past her ear, she debated whether to share her concerns with him. She hated to burden him with the troubling thoughts ricocheting through her mind, especially so soon after he’d experienced his own trauma. If she didn’t find an outlet soon, however, she worried she might explode, to the detriment of her career or anyone who stood nearby.

The following afternoon, Geneva rushed back to her quarters as soon as she completed her duties for the day. She grabbed her civilian communicator from the closet and left as quickly as she’d arrived. Slipping through the hallways of the ship, she found an empty office and locked the door behind her. Never before had she made such a call in times of distress, but she was running out of valid options.

“Geneva, sweetie!” Dahlia’s voice rang through loud and clear from the speaker. “How are you?”

“Hello, Mother.” She shuffled away from the door to further ensure no one would hear their conversation. “I’m fine.”

“I trust you made it back to the ship following the service, without any problems?”

“I did. Ash’s family wanted me to thank you for all the food you sent over.”

“Yes, I received a very nice note from his mother. We’ll have to find a way to get together one of these days.” She paused. “But somehow, I don’t think this is the only reason you called.”

Geneva didn’t answer.

“Sweetie, is everything okay? What’s going on?”

“Nothing’swrong, really.” Rolling out a chair from beneath one of the desks in the office, she collapsed into it and sighed. “But nothing feels right, either.”

“Is there something I can help you with?”

“I don’t know. I’m not sure.” She exhaled. “Don’t get too excited, but I’ve been thinking about leaving the military.”

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