“I love you too,” I tell him, realizing that I didn’t say it back. I don’t know why, but I get the impression he hasn’t been told it many times before.

MATTEO

“What are you doing out here all alone?” I turn my head away from watching the ocean when I hear her voice come from behind me. I thought she’d be flat-out asleep after all the different ways I’ve made love to her since our guests left the island.

“Couldn’t sleep.” I shrug, continuing to watch the waves slide onto the sand and drag back out, again.

“We could talk about whatever's on your mind?” She sits down beside me, burying her feet in the sand as I wrap my arm around her shoulders.

“Some things are better left unsaid.” I kiss the top of her head and smell her hair, despite the coconut undertone of her shampoo, she smells of me, and I love it.

“I disagree, I think whatever it is that’s on your mind would feel much better if you shared it. Are you scared about my father being in L.A.?”

“I’m not scared of your father, Aria.” I shake my head. “I told you, I’m figuring all that out.”

Aria called Stevan last week and the fact he hasn’t told her he’s in L.A., and he wasn’t as pressing with her about where she was, makes me even more certain that he knows she’s with me. But he is not what I’ve got on my mind, tonight.

“Okay, so if it’s not my father that's keeping you awake, what is it?”

“Just old memories.” I smile to myself, sadly.

“You must have had some good memories here. You said your family have always owned this place. Did you visit as a child?” She sounds so optimistic and innocent, and I don’t want to spoil that. Demitri’s right, this version of myself is only for her. But, to anyone else, I am unchanged. Aria Romano deserves to know what kind of man she’s really married to.

“Yeah, I visited here as a child. I killed my first man, right over there, by those rocks.” I point my finger over to the other side of the beach and when Aria twists her head back to look at me all the optimism has gone from her face.

“We came out here one summer for some family time. Just before we got here, Dad found out that Mom had been screwing her personal trainer. He had him flown out here a few days later as a surprise for her.” I swallow the lump in my throat when I remember her shocked face. Father had told us over breakfast that he had a gift for her, then had Gino drag her lover, bound and gagged, into the room. Aria takes hold of the hand I've got hanging over her shoulder and squeezes it tight.

“He had me shoot him, right in front of her,” I explain, hearing her breath catch in shock. “It was the first time I’d ever killed anyone, and I remember the fear in that man's eyes when I pulled the trigger.” I hate how weak I sound, and how her eyes are pitying me now.

“That’s an awful thing to make a child do. How old were you?”

“I was ten, and the worst part about it is that at the time, the person I was most mad at was my mom.”

“And now?” Aria asks, sounding intrigued.

“Now, I see it for what it really was, it was all part of the games my dad liked to play. He had loads of different women. Mom would turn a blind eye to it all, he’d bring his mistresses to this island and leave Demitri’s father, Gino, in charge back home. I’ve seen him cheat on my mom more times than I can remember. What he did that day made me realize that I could never be a normal kid, or grow up to have a normal life. It was a test, and over the years he gave me many more.”

“So, that's why you hate it here so much,” she whispers softly.

“That’s part of the reason. I’m not gonna sit here and lie to you, Aria. Killing men doesn’t bother me, any more, there are times I even get a sick little kick out of it. Like when I killed Dennis Jefferson, and those men on that list. But the last thing my dad asked me to do was the hardest.” I look up at the stars and remember looking up at the same constellation that night. The air was thick and sticky just like it is now, and suddenly my pulse starts beating the same way it did, five years ago.

“What happened, Matteo?” Aria can’t hide the worry from her eyes as she twists her body more into mine.

“Dad was really ill for the last few years of his life, he had all kinds of specialists look at him, and no one could help. For a long time, he managed to cover it up. Him and Mom were still married but living separate lives and he spent all his time out here. Me and Gino were running things back home. Then one day, he summoned me out here. I was really shocked when I saw him and realized how bad he’d gotten.” I can still remember the paleness of his skin and how it sagged from his bones. He’d looked like a corpse, already. “He told me there was no life for him, anymore, that the pain had become unbearable and he asked me to take it away.”

“He asked you to kill him?” I watch her eyes widen.

“Yeah,” I admit, letting the sand slide through the fingers of my free hand.

“Matteo…?”

“I got that he wanted to die, anyone could see he was in pain.”

“But to ask that of your son…” She shakes her head, still stunned.

“Well, that was him for you, looking to teach a lesson in any way he could.” The laugh I make isn’t done out of humor, it comes from deep-rooted sadness that I can’t believe I’m actually sharing with her.

“He told me a lion who wants to take over the pride, would have to kill to take his spot, he said the job was mine and no one else’s. It was my responsibility to carry it out.”