Page 36 of Among the Sins of my Father

But there’s still this fear that’s settled in my chest. Berkley thinks we share the same darkness, but I’ve hidden the depths of my deeds. I’ve restrained myself around her. She hasn’t been witness to the things I’ve done. She’s innocent.

And I’m afraid if she comes to know the truth of who I am, she’ll turn her back on me and never look back. Part of me knows that’s what’s best for her. But the other part of me, the selfish part, the part that craves her, can’t imagine the darkness of my life without her in it. I don’t want to return to the man I was before. The one who presents a lie to the world and then hides his true self in the darkness of his castle.

Berkley has shown me I can have more than that. I can have someone to love who will love me back. Someone who doesn’t shy away from me. Who wants to know me. Even if I’m scared of showing her my darkest parts.

Barrett and I don’t talk during the drive home. His mistake weighs on him heavily. I don’t talk about it though, as I know it won’t help. Barrett is a man who likes to stay trapped inside his own head. It’s a trait I appreciate.

It’s the wee hours of the morning by the time we pull up outside the Sanctuary. There’s a full moon tonight, and the light gives the Sanctuary an eerie glow. The door creaks loudly when Barrett pulls it open and I carry my mother inside. She’s in desperate need of a bath or a shower, but in her current state, all we can do is lie her down on a bed and wait for the doctor to arrive.

Barrett stays with her as I make my way to Berkley’s room. There’s almost a desperation to see her, as though the time apart has placed an invisible wound inside me that only she can repair.

The only light in her room comes from the moonlight seeping through the edges of her curtains. I creep over to her bed. I just want to slide under the covers and wrap my body around hers. I want the comfort of her. The pleasure of her. She reminds me that there’s good in the world if we look for it.

But she’s not there.

I storm from her room and into my office, flicking on the screens that show the security cameras. It seems to take an eternity for them to finally show the images. My eyes scan over them hungrily as the dread in my chest grows tighter. Room after room shows as empty. Even the cell which holds the monster. I slam my fist on the desk as my fear grows.

“Barrett!” His name echoes through the house. “Barrett! Gideon! Hope! Berkley!” I expect them all to come running out of their rooms in panic even though I know Berkley wasn’t in hers. There’s a part of me still clinging to some sort of hope of an explanation other than the obvious.

“Everything okay?” Barrett comes jogging toward me.

“He’s gone,” I snap.

“Who’s gone?”

“Atterton.” I start to stride down to the basement, panic pumping through my veins.

“What’s happening?” Gideon appears, hair tousled, eyes blurry. “What’s going on?” He starts jogging after us. “Where are we going?”

The pace of my steps increases as I rip open the doors and storm through them until I find myself standing outside the monster’s door.

I take a deep breath before I key in the code and send up a prayer that it’s a glitch with the cameras. Nothing more. But even as I hold out hope, my heart beats erratically because I know. Deep down, I already know.

I swing open the door to an empty cell. “Fuck.”

Gideon pokes his head around the corner. “Where did he go?”

Ignoring his confused expression, I turn and bark orders.

“Barrett, go to Hope and check she’s okay. Gideon, check on the staff and make sure everyone is accounted for. I’ll go check on Ette.”

I sound calmer than I feel. I’m not one to jump to conclusions. I need to check on everyone first, but deep down I know it’s pointless. My mother was a distraction. This is the retaliation.

I don’t bother to be quiet when I barge into Ette’s room. I call out her name as soon as I enter, but only silence replies. Turning on my heel, I run back into my office and access the storage for the camera feeds.

I see men silently stalking through the house dressed all in black. The additional guards I’d hired were taken out before they even realized someone was there. The men in black split into two groups. They drag Berkley from her bed and drag her down to the basement. They carry Ette from the house. They leave everyone else alone.

I sink to my chair.For a moment, I feel nothing. No rage. No terror. Nothing. It’s a strange feeling, this nothingness. My skin feels as though it lifts from my body, as though it’s held in suspension, and then after hovering for a few moments, it crashes back against me, wrapping my bones in reality.

The monster is gone.

Berkley is gone.

Ette is gone.

They’ve been stolen.

The rage drives me back to my feet and I let out an anguished cry as I swipe my desk, sending the contents clattering to the floor.

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