Page 75 of Say You Love Me

“He hit his head, Hudson.”

“What do you mean?”

She points to the white hull of a nearby boat. “He just sank.”

I stumble toward the water, almost tripping over a loose plank discarded near the edge. Pushing my jeans over my hips, I shove my phone into Finity’s hand and then I dive, the coldness of the water taking my breath away as it envelops me.

“Where about?” I thrash in the water, searching for any sign of him.

“It’s too late.” Finity’s eyes glaze over. “He’s gone.”

“Where about?” I scream before diving under the surface. It’s too dark, too murky to see anything. I flounder about, thrashing desperately, hoping my fingers will find what my eyes can’t.

I gasp in air when I rise to the surface. “Call the police. Call the ambulance. Call someone!”

I keep trying to find any sign of him but it’s pointless.

Rylee is gone.

Dragging myself back onto the dock, I roll onto my back, drawing in deep breaths of air as I listen to Finity on the phone. Her voice is calm and collected, just like it was the last time she made the call.

“Yes,” she says, her eyes locked on mine. “Yes,” she says again. And then she holds the phone out, repeating the words that have haunted my dreams for the past few months. “It’s for you.”

I rip the phone from her and answer the questions of the operator. They make me stay on the phone. They advise me not to go back into the water.

Finity sits on the edge, her feet dangling, her eyes scanning the darkness as though she expects him to appear from the depths. It’s only when sirens sound in the distance that the operator lets me hang up.

I sit by my wife and gather her in my arms. “Finity, tell me what happened.” I swallow the knot of guilt at my throat. There’s a fear settling in my gut. I’d just had a fight with the guy. When they drag him to the surface, they will see the marks and bruises on his face.

She leans against me but her body is cold and stiff, as though she were the one who’d been in the water and not me. She doesn’t seem to care or notice that the wetness of me is soaking into her clothing. She doesn’t seem to care or notice that she’s trembling.

“He fell,” she says. Her voice is dull and lifeless. “He hit his head and fell.” Her eyes never leave the water. She stares into the depths as though the power of her gaze alone might bring him to the surface. I stroke her hair and place kisses on her forehead.

Her fingers tighten on my clothing, clutching onto me as the medics rush to our side. They disentangle us, dragging her away from me as her eyes widen with panic and her hands reach for me.

“It’s okay,” I say to her. “I’m here. I’m right here. I’m never leaving.”

And it’s in that moment, as her fingers are stretched toward me in desperation and her eyes are wide with fear, I know I’ve truly forgiven her. I’ve stopped blaming her. It wasn’t her fault. It wasn’t either of our fault.

She is my wife.

Until death do us part.

Not the death of another. Not even the death of our child. We are joined together for life. Finity is my life and I am hers. Nothing can tear us apart.

They question us separately. I tell them the truth and Finity tells them what they need to hear.

I admit that we fought.

I admit that he loved my wife.

Finity tells them that he fell.

There are no tears in her eyes when the divers find his body. They told us to go home and get some rest, but Finity wouldn’t leave. For hours we stand wrapped in each other’s arms, waiting.

It’s only once his body has been loaded into the ambulance and taken away that she allows me to bring her back to the lake house. Then she just lies in my arms without saying a word. She clings to me, drawing strength from me, and I do what I should have done the night Calla died. I hold her. I comfort her. And I give her everything she needs.

chapter thirty-six

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