Page 35 of Tears and Other Fears

I worked my tongue, trying to force it out. All the while, Samuel laughed while zeroing in his green-eyed gaze at my throat. “Now you get to die the same way William did. I’m so glad I kept that batch.” His voice was strained.

I bucked my hips, trying to force him off of me. My bare skin rubbed against his clothes, and I could feel the pill dissolving in my mouth. It had a bitter taste that made me sick.

“That’s right, baby. Take it. Just swallow, I know you want to. You miss William, and I miss my life before you came—” A harsh grunt escaped his lips, cutting off his words. I had slammed my leg into his, praying it shocked him enough to give me an advantage. I just needed time.

Samuel was right. I wanted to live. I was terrified to lose the five contacts in my overpriced smartphone.

The hand holding my wrist tightened, clutching me harder. His nails dug into my skin, breaking it open and allowing blood to pool out. The hand over my mouth was relentless. He pushed my lips tightly against my teeth. I breathed in through my nose, choking on the smell of alcohol seeping through his sweaty pores.

“Swallow it, you cunt,” he demanded while eyeing my throat once more. I bucked, and he released my wrists to pick my head up by my strawberry blond hair and slam it against the hard floor. My vision turned black as I felt the pill jolt down my throat.

Samuel threw me a sinister smile, and my stomach dropped. He got off of me, and I pulled myself up to a sitting position. The pill was gone. I’d swallowed it.

“Say hello to William for me,” Samuel said as my head throbbed. I could practically feel my brain expand and pulse with pain.

Samuel took one last look at me, and I cringed, my limbs shaking with dull anger. I was too weak to lash out. I almost couldn’t think about the pill sliding through my body, because my skull left me feeling disoriented. “Fuck you,” I slurred.

Samuel Smith didn’t even bother responding. He just left the penthouse with the calmness of a soulless killer. Was this how it was with William? Did he turn his back on my brother with a smile?

Crawling. Dying. Crying.

I picked up my cell phone and dialed the one person I knew would be my savior. I could barely see the screen, my vision so blurred. Noah answered on the first ring.

”We’re almost there. I’m trying not to get my hopes up with those naked photos you sent, but you seem eager to see me, Octavia. I can’t keep up.” His words shook me. My vision was going black.

“Noah?” I croaked. His name felt like a curse and a prayer.

“Octavia? Are you okay?” he rushed out; I could hear the concern in his gruff tone.

I could only choke out two little words that I knew would reach him. Two words that I never asked him for.

“Save me.”

Epilogue

Renon

“She’s in ICU. Critical condition.”

That’s all the text said from Noah. We had been out having dinner, minding our own business and chatting about addiction and all its bullshit forms when Octavia was attacked. I just wanted to get to know the guy, figured it was only polite since we were both getting our dick worshipped by the same girl.

Well,Iwas getting my dick worshipped. He was apparently suffering a case of blue balls. I’d feel bad for the guy if I weren’t happy to have more of her attention. Regardless, I was in the business of addiction, and that man looked like he’d be interested in what I’m selling. When I ordered a beer, his pussy ass hands trembled with need, though for some reason, I didn’t offer him asample.It just didn’t come up in conversation. I was telling myself it was because he didn’t seem interested, not because I didn’t want to break Octavia’s heart. Fuck. What the fucking fuck is fucking wrong with me? Fuck!

I didn’t do this. I didn’t do hearts, flowers, and empathy.

And now I was here with a gun in my hands, figuring out how to handle this Samuel Smith situation. I told myself that I signed on to lodge a bullet in his skull because I was feeling murderous. Not because some chick with fantastic tits was currently recovering in a hospital suite on the rich side of town. Fucking Nathaniel Youngblood and his connections.

I didn’t know what it was about Octavia that had my nuts in a twist, but I wanted more. That beautiful, mind-fuck of a crazy girl. I wanted to see her.

I’d punched a fucking hole in the wall when I found her naked and seizing on the ground. Noah had to call the ambulance, because I was too pissed off, and I couldn’t stay to make sure she was okay, because the police have been on my ass for months.

Samuel Smith was going to die. Slowly. Painfully. He’d been a thorn in my side since we took him on. I figured he’d be a good pusher. Had the capital to pay for the drugs, and the connections to make cushy rich pricks comfortable. Dealing made people uncomfortable, but he seemed personable enough to sell the good shit to the people that liked a hit without the stigma of a shady kid in a bad part of town.

If I could go back and tell him to fuck off, I would.

It was almost too easy to sneak into his house and wait on his bed. He was out with some friends, probably celebrating graduation and Octavia’s death. Or maybe getting drunk and high enough to forget the hit he had on his head. He didn’t even seem to care about getting caught anymore, and that sort of recklessness was bad for business.

His parents were out. The house was quiet. I sat there on his bed, staring at the floor where Octavia and I had fucked, while thinking about how ridiculous this all was. She’d warned me. She’d really warned me. And here I was, craving my next hit. I needed to fuck her out of my system. Yeah, that was it. Once she was better, I was going to drive my dick so far into her that it got bored and looked for a new pussy to obsess over. I never stayed interested for long. I was a wanderer in every sense of the word.

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