Page 56 of Severance

“Because I didn’t know, Kai,” I breathe. “I didn’t know that she existed until you did. They never wanted either of us to know the truth.”

“That makes no sense.” He shakes his head in frustration and runs his hands roughly through his hair. “Why didn’t Anthony tell us before? He fucking knew about this for almost a decade.” He pauses and his face pales. “Oh my god. We have a daughter who is almost ten years old. That’s ten years of her life that we missed entirely.”

“You think that I didn’t think about this already?” My tone is clipped as I glare at him. “I spent those ten years as a fucking train wreck.” I pause. “Please, Kai… enlighten me on what the fuck you were doing that entire time?”

Tilting his head to the side, he gives me a confused look. “I already did.”

“No,” I say, shaking my head. “You gave me bits and pieces, if you even want to call it that. If we’re really in this together, I deserve to know how your life ended up perfectly when I ended up in a strip club, fucking John’s for an extra buck.”

Kai lets out a harsh laugh as his brown eyes grow darker. “You think my life was perfect?” He sneers. “Why? Because of the materialistic bullshit and the money?”

Crossing my arms, I glare at him as he continues to stare at me with hardened eyes.

“My life was far from perfect. I was surrounded by the men who ruined you and I was still powerless compared to them.” Kai pauses and shakes his head as a wave of rage swirls in his brown irises. “I did exactly what you did; I did what I had to do to survive. I created a life, one that was an illusion to cover up the fact that I was merely existing.”

I stare at him in disbelief as he continues to spew his lies. “Were you merely existing as you got engaged and stacked your fucking paper?”

“I told you, that engagement was practically a business arrangement between Anthony and I. There was never even a real proposal; it was just decided one day and Aliana was informed on it. Everything on the outside was all for show; it was all to appease Luca and to keep you safe.”

I laugh out loud as I shake my head at him. “Un-fucking-believable.” I chuckle. “Don’t use me as an excuse for your undeniable greed or whatever fucked up reason you have for continuing to associate with them.”

“Dahlia,” Kai starts as he attempts to move closer. I jump to my feet quickly and move just beyond his reach. A frown falls onto his face. “You don’t get it… if Luca was happy, he didn’t give a shit about what was going on with the rest of the world. I kept him happy and Anthony kept you safe.”

“But he really didn’t,” I interject. “He made you believe that he was, but in reality, your father knew where I was the entire time, which is more than I can say for you.”

Kai rolls his eyes as he exhales a breath of frustration. “He knew where you were, but he didn’t make a move, because of Anthony and because of the deal I made with him.” He stops and his frown deepens. “I told you why I didn’t know where you were and why I didn’t come after you.”

I fucking know, I was there for the goddamn conversation.

This is all a mess… a goddamn shit show. How did we finally find each other, find out we have a kid and now we’re fighting over the past?

He looked our past in the fucking face every day and yet, he did nothing.

My mind is at war with itself and I’m struggling to play the referee. I know which side needs to fold, but demons don’t walk away from a fight, not without a little bit of blood on their hands.

“Why did it take you this long, Kai?” I demand.

His eyebrows pinch together. “I already told you that you were safer that—”

“No,” I cut him off abruptly. “I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about them.” All color drains from Kai’s face as he stares at me. “You spent ten fucking years around those men and you did absolutely nothing.”

Roughly running his fingers through his hair, Kai drags his hands down his face and takes a deep breath. “My revenge grew and became more than just killing them. I listened to Luca, I went to college and got a business degree like he demanded and took over his company. I wanted to bleed him dry before watching the life leave his eyes.”

The irrational demon inside my mind grows weaker, as the haze of rage is slowly lifted. It makes sense and in some fucked up way, it almost seems smart. But how can someone live like that, in the company of monsters?

Perhaps we’re more different than I thought.

“I get it,” I admit quietly. “That doesn’t mean I agree with it, but I understand. What I don’t understand is how you were okay with associating with them after everything.”

Kai gently pats the bed beside him and watches me as he waits. Hesitantly, I take a few steps closer and sit down on the soft mattress.

“We’re not so different, you and me,” he says quietly and I glance over at him, raising an eyebrow. “How were you okay with the life that you lived?”

It’s a rhetorical question, but he’s right; I was doing what I needed to, to survive.

“We suit up in our armor and detach from the world and the people in it. We hold our cards close and our guards never fall. No one gets in, because if they do, they never get out.”

With wide eyes, I simply stare at him, taken aback by his words. He spoke nothing but the absolute truth and knowing that he lived the same emotionless life that I did hit me in an unexplainable way.