Page 94 of Beyond Rosy Irish Twilight

“And now you’re married,” Chase smirked.

“Yes, and it wasn’t a marriage of choice. Not that I would change anything. I like Jade a lot. She’s great, but we’re doing everything backwards. We don’t know each other the way you normally do when you decide to get married.”

“So, let’s say we end this thing,” Patrick said, leaning forward, “are you going to make this work with her?”

I opened my mouth to answer, but nothing came out. The truth was, I didn’t know what would happen. I couldn’t just abandon her, and now that we’d spent time together, it was like I even wanted to walk away.

“Uh-oh,” Patrick grinned. “He’s thinking.”

“That’s never a good thing,” Chase retorted.

“I was just thinking that I’m not sure what would happen. She’s my wife. Fake or not, she’s part of this now. I could never just walk away from her. But there doesn’t seem to be any way this is going to end well for us. I mean, forget about any kind of family. That’s not going to happen as long as we live this life.”

Patrick grinned at me. “Are you thinking of settling down with the wife?”

Was I? Hell, I would be one lucky bastard if she wanted to stay with me after this. But I wasn’t sure that would ever happen at this point. We were so deep in this game with no clear way out.

“Do you think she’d ever want a guy like me to father her children?” I joked to hide my own insecurities.

“Are you kidding? With your winning personality and that ugly mug?” Patrick shot back. “She’d be a fool not to take you up on that offer.”

I flipped him off. “Better than your face.”

“Ooh, burn,” he joked. “You really got me. I’m hurting now.”

My eyes flicked to Chase, waiting for him to join in the banter, but he was staring hard at the desk, not saying a word. “Something on your mind?”

He finally met my gaze, staring at me intently. “We were stupid for taking this job. It’s admirable, but…I don’t think we truly knew what we were giving up.”

“I knew,” I admitted. “I just didn’t realize I would find someone along the way that I actually wanted a life with. And she’s the daughter of the man we’re trying to take down. I’m not sure how we get out of this.”

It was silent as we all sat there contemplating what our lives had turned into. At OPS, we would have been busy, constantly on the road with jobs. But here…this was the dark underworld. Nothing good ever came out of being here. Every time I sold a shipment of weapons, I felt dirty. Even if I was working toward taking down The Pike Crime Syndicate, I was still putting weapons in the hands of men that would sell drugs, traffic women and children, and various other criminal enterprises. That didn’t make me a better person. Eventually, you just became part of the problem.

“There’s no way to end this quickly. We’ve been at it for months and we’ve got nothing.”

“Not true,” Chase said. “You got in with Ambrose. That’s closer than we ever thought we’d get.”

“But I can’t make a move without him. There’s no way to get in further with the other organizations without his expressed permission. He said he wanted to move on one of these other organizations, but has yet to fill me in on what kind of plan he has.”

“Then we need to move forward with our own plans. Call Ambrose and schedule a meeting for the good doctor. That gives you an in. Maybe while you’re there you can get some idea of what’s going on,” Chase suggested.

“You don’t think it’s too soon? If we tip our hand, that could backfire on us in a big way.”

“And if we do nothing, we make no progress at all,” he pointed out.

Against my better judgment, I picked up the phone and dialed. Either we’d walk away from this in a stronger position, or it would be the end of us. But we couldn’t sit around waiting any longer. My gaze flicked to Chase’s as Ambrose picked up the phone. I sure as fuck hoped I was doing the right thing.

35

JADE

“Can I get you anything else?”

I smiled at the cook and shook my head. “No, I’ll just take the coffee. Thank you.”

I turned and headed for the back door. The staff was minimal around here, only coming in for part of the day. I hadn’t really had the opportunity to make friends with any of them. Most days, I was asleep until after they left.

Patrick was already outside, so I took a seat beside him at the table. Things had been tense between us for the last few weeks, ever since I snapped at him. He always had a friendly smile for me, but I could tell he was backing away. If I didn’t take the first step in making this right, he never would.

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