Page 30 of Beyond Rosy Irish Twilight

I woke up to the sound of the ocean lapping against the shore. As rested as I felt, there was still a dragging feeling, like sleep wasn’t ready to leave me yet. I sat up in bed, still dressed in my wedding dress. It was sad that such a beautiful dress was now wrinkled. Then again, it wasn’t the dress I would have chosen anyway. It was the first dress I thought my father would approve of.

I stood up and started unhooking all the clasps and buttons. I could feel the indents that were painfully pinching my flesh. Finally, the dress fell and pooled at my feet, but I was still dressed in a corset. All I longed for right now was a pair of shorts and a tank top. The warm breeze from the water was beckoning me to come enjoy the golden sand.

I wasn’t entirely sure I had free rein to go wherever I wanted, but since no guards were standing directly outside my door, I took that to mean that I wasn’t a prisoner. I kicked off my heels and winced as my bare feet hit the wood floors. Even in sleep, my heels tortured me.

A throat cleared behind me and I spun around, my eyes wide as I took in Asher dressed in beige shorts and a t-shirt. I’d never seen him in anything but a suit. This was a refreshing look on him. He was more relaxed, but the way he looked at me still sent shivers down my spine. His eyes roved over the sheer white corset I donned, and the thigh-high garters were definitely something his eyes zeroed in on.

But even with him gazing at me like he wanted to ravage me, I quickly grabbed the silk coverup on the back of the door and slung it around my shoulders. As soon as it was tied around my waist, he seemed to collect himself.

“I just came to check on you. You were out for a while.”

“Yeah, Patrick gave me something.”

He nodded. “I’m glad it helped.”

Silence hung between us as we both watched each other. I had no idea what I was supposed to say or do. Patrick told me we were going on a honeymoon, but I wasn’t sure what that entailed for me.

“I made sure you had plenty of swimsuits and…things,” he said, like any typical guy.

“Thank you.”

“You’re free to go anywhere you want. If you go in the water, please make sure Patrick is around. He’s a very strong swimmer.”

I nodded, unsure of what else to say.

“There’s a restaurant you can order from and…”

“Where will you be?”

“I have work to conduct.”

That was the only thing he told me. I wasn’t sure if that meant he might see me at mealtimes or if it was basically an informative fuck you. Either way, I wasn’t exactly chomping at the bit to spend time with him. He made it very clear that this was nothing like a typical marriage, and it never would be.

“Okay.”

He stared at me for a moment, and just for a split second, I thought he wanted to say something more. But then he turned around and walked out of the hut, slipping his sunglasses into place. I walked over to the side curtain that blew slightly in the breeze. Pulling it apart, I peeked around the edge of it and watched as he walked up to one of his guards and started barking out orders. The man looked perfectly chastised and gave a slight bow of his head before hurrying away.

Sighing, I let the curtain go and walked back over to the bed. I finished stripping out of my corset and put on a tank and loose pants. I laid down on the bed and stared up at the ceiling fan. A whole week of this. With no one to talk to and nothing exciting, I wasn’t sure how I was going to pass the time.

I rolled off the bed and walked over to the dresser. The drawers were filled with cute beach clothes, most of which I couldn’t wear, and bikinis. Swimming was definitely out, no matter how much I wanted to jump in the water. Still, I could enjoy the feel of the sand between my toes.

I grabbed some sunglasses on the dresser and headed out into the sun. It was already extremely hot, and I was sweating in my tank top. I had to be certain that the back went all the way up to my neck and it didn’t have a racerback.

Looking in both directions, I thought I might see someone else on the beach, but instead, there were only guards stationed every so often. They stared out into the ocean, then walked along the shore as they scoped out the rest of the area. I rolled my eyes at the lengths Asher was going to for safety.

Granted, at home it had been very scary, but this was an island. I felt a greater level of security here than ever before in my life. I headed toward the ocean, dipping just my toes in the water. A slight smile split my lips as I realized this was a first for me. I’d never been to the ocean, let alone felt lake water on my toes.

But as quickly as joy spread through me, I realized that I was all alone in this moment. There was no man to share this moment with. There was no man that was holding my hand and smiling at me. My own husband was off doing his own thing while I merely existed in my own sad world.

The joy and luster of the ocean didn’t mean anything to me anymore. It was just another destination I was bound to discover alone and share with no one. Even my mother wouldn’t be able to truly appreciate what I was witnessing. Deep down, I knew she wasn’t really able to hear anything I said, no matter how much I prayed for something else.

And Margaret, she was sweet and always on my side, but she hated the beach. My father wouldn’t care about anything other than resuming whatever he had going with Asher.

With those sad, depressing thoughts taking over, I turned from the beautiful blue ocean and headed back to my hut, sliding my toes through the sand the whole way. I didn’t need to see all that beauty when I knew it wouldn’t last. It wouldn’t be a memory to hold onto.

I climbed the steps and flopped back down in bed, closing my eyes and letting sleep take over.

13

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