Page 21 of Grin and Bear It

“Why?” Nash asked, everything he was holding back evident in his voice.

“She keeps talking about this fucking essay—” Knox said, scorn dripping from his lips.

“Knox,” Tyson said, but the boy shook his head sharply.

“She was saying how important it was to our final grade and that she was gonna call parents if the draft wasn’t submitted.”

My heart beat hard and fast in my ears as I remembered that exact conversation. It was a means of accountability that most students needed, but I’d also said multiple times that those kids who needed an extension or additional help could talk to me.

“She was gonna ring you.” Knox bit that off, then scowled at me. “And then we’d be in the shit.”

“Damn right—” Cole started to say, but Nash cut him off with a look.

“Fellas, we talked about this,” he said to his nephews. “I told you to come to us.”

“Come to you?” Maddox’s lip curled. “You’ve been in your room since they died. You hadn’t had a shower in weeks. How were we supposed to…?”

When his voice broke, so did his resolve, and he settled back on his chair, arms crossed firmly, Knox mirroring his brother’s body language.

“You could have come to me,” Cole insisted, but the boys just seemed to close down further than that, but that’s when Lin leaned forward.

“Did you mean to do it?” He didn’t clarify what and they didn’t ask questions, daring to glance at him as Lin’s tone was soft and gentle. “Did you mean to hurt your teacher like that? You know what it would be like, if we gave Ms Jennings some embarrassing photos of you when you were little.”

“Got all those shots from when you were little tackers.” Cole’s voice softened finally, a small smile forming before he looked at me. “I could give you some to show the class if you like?”

I blinked, my refusal on my lips, but just as when I spoke to Nash last night, my throat seemed to close over.

I didn’t want that. Getting involved in mutual shaming was never going to help anyone, but as I stared into those cool blue eyes, all rational thought seemed to desert me. That sensible voice inside my head prompted, then demanded that I say something, but before I could, Tyson spoke up.

“That won’t be needed, will it?” He nodded to the boys and they glanced at each other before straightening up.

This had the air of something well practised and sure enough, the boys cleared their throats and looked at me. I hurt for them when their eyes met mine, despite everything they’d put me through. Because that was the thing about being a teacher, an element that made me wonder how long I could keep this up. Kids hurt you without even meaning to, although sometimes they did, but you couldn’t lose hope. You couldn’t put up all your walls and keep them out, not if you were going to help them the best you could.

“We’re…” Knox shook his head. “I’m sorry, Miss. I was being a dick…” He glanced quickly over at June, waiting for her to reprimand him, but she was frozen to the spot. “And I shouldn’t have done that. And could you please not show photos of me to the class.”

I snorted and I saw the first genuine smile on his face since before his parents’ accident. With that, the tension in the room seemed to evaporate.

“I won’t. But…” His smile faltered then. “Can you come to me and talk about your concerns? About your classwork if that’s all you feel comfortable with. But also… anything else, if you want.”

“We will,” Maddox added.

“Now we’ve got that out of the way,” Nash told June, “we wanted to discuss some community service the boys will be doing.”

“You’re getting them involved in a local charity?” she asked in a pleased voice. “That can be just the thing to re-engage students.”

“Not a charity,” he corrected. “Ms Jennings and I had a bit of a chat after she let me know the situation with the boys. She has some plumbing work that needs to be done at her place and I submitted a competitive quote for the job.”

He did? I blinked.

“If it's acceptable to Ms Jennings, we’ll complete the work needed and the boys will do some work experience, serving as our trade assistants.” I watched the boys shift in their seats. “After school, of course.”

“Oh.” I watched the cogs whirring inside June’s head and knew she was running through exactly the same thoughts as I was. Was this above board? What would the department say about something like this? Did it fall within the guidelines of acceptable behaviour? Part of me wanted her to say no, to get me off the hook, even if Nash had sorted all of my current issues out in one evening. “Well, I guess that’s alright, as long as it doesn’t interfere with their school work and extra curriculars.”

“It won’t.” Cole stared intently at the boys. “Going forward, they’ll be getting all their homework done on time. If you’d like to circulate my email to all the boys’ teachers, I’m happy to follow up with them on any work outstanding.”

“I’ll make sure to do so,” June said, getting to her feet. “Now, the boys need to get to class.”

The meeting was over and I was up and out of my seat faster than the twins, the three of us racing towards the door, but as Cole stopped to talk to June and the boys loped off to get back to class, I was stopped.

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