Page 139 of Grin and Bear It

Say thank you, dickhead!I told myself.Offer steak and blow jobs for a week. No, a month!

“I…”

They have slaved and spent countless thousands on this place, so show some respect!I snapped at myself, but the words wouldn’t come.

“I…”

“El, it’s OK.” Colleen seemed to know, walking away from Dale and moving to take my hands, squeezing them as she stared into my eyes. “Just tell them.”

Because she knew. Through the powers of bestie-ness, she already knew what I was feeling and she was giving me permission to express that.

“I want to sell the house,” I finally blurted out.

“Oh thank fuck!” Lin yelped, letting out a massive sigh.

“What?” I asked, staring at the lot of them.

“We wanted to make this house perfect for you,” Nash explained, “until you felt ready to move in with us. Like we’d make it work if you wanted to stay, but the place only has three bedrooms.”

“We all need our space,” Cole said. “Especially me. Those fucks snore and Lin’s farts peel the paint off the walls when he’s been eating dried apricots.”

“What about you when you have ice cream?” Lin shot back.

“I’m lactose intolerant, you fuck,” was Cole’s reply. Lin mimicked him in a high pitched voice.

“So you’re ready?” Nash asked, stepping forward, his eyes shining. “I mean, if you need more time—”

“This place was a mistake the moment I bought it,” I said, then met Coll’s gaze. “One we tried to work through, but… At some point you have to cut your losses and move on and I think I…” I smiled and she did too, as Dale moved closer to slot his body in against her. “We’re ready to move on.”

“Hope you are looking for a roommate, babe,” she told Dale. “Because this bitch is moving in! You’re going to need to empty your wardrobes of… everything, because I have a lot of clothes to bring.”

He just chuckled, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

“Anything for my mate.”

“No, you don’t understand. You’ll be lucky to fit your shit in like a duffel bag or something because, baby, mumma likes her shoes. I’ve got stilettos in every colour, then there’s all my cool boots.”

“Will you promise to model every single pair for me?” Dale asked her in a low voice.

“Ooh, gotta a little foot fetish going on, babe? Hidden depths, Dale, hidden depths. I’ll let you polish them with your tongue as long as afterwards—”

Whatever X-rated scenario she was anticipating, it got cut off by a big hand slapped over her mouth.

“Later, my mate,” he said in a low growl and that’s when her eyes rolled back, a slow shiver going all the way through her. She wriggled free, then threw herself into his arms, where he cradled her against his chest.

“You know I love it when you growl like that. Take me home and play Goldilocks and the three bears with me?” she said, twining her fingers in his hair.

“There’s only one of me and I don’t shift,” Dale said.

“That’s OK, we can role play it, but instead of me tasting porridge, you can use your tongue to—”

“Looks fantastic, El,” Dale told me, whisking Colleen out of the house. “I’m sure you’ll get a great price for it. Colleen will come and pack all of her shit later. Much, much later.”

But when the two of them were gone and there was only the four of us left, all eyes went to me.

“Goldilocks and the three bears?” Lin said with a sparkle in his eyes. “Wanna find out who’s too big, who’s too small and who’s just right?”

Of course I said yes, even if we all found out quickly that they were all just slightly too big, which made them perfect.

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