Page 56 of Rocking Her Silence

I look at him in astonishment, then close my eyes.

No eye contact means no communication for someone like me. And that's what I need right now.

Just a moment to collect myself.

He lets me have it. My brother knows me well.

When I open my eyes and look up again, he is patiently waiting for me.

'How…'I start signing, then drop my hands to my lap.

I try again.'You… he…'

Then I stop, frustrated at myself for being too scared to ask what I want to know. What I need to know.

Jared gets my broken question anyway.

'I cannot stress this enough, sis. I went in there, sure I would walk up to some fucker out to get you. Someone that would take advantage of you and then leave town or something. He really convinced me otherwise.'

After a little bit, I realize that he is also sim-comming. I can tell because of the way his throat is working that he's actually using his voice too. He really means what he's saying. Really believes that Carson—

Jared goes on… "He was incredibly earnest, Mia… very persuasive. You know I'm trained to catch BS. My gut told me he meant it when he said he would never harm you. It looked like he was getting physically ill at the mere mention of the possibility."

For some reason, my brother's surety shakes my own even more than it already was.

'Sure, the bureau trained you to spot liars. And I'm studying that stuff myself… but no matter what Carson said. People lie, Jared… people lie, and people hurt each other. Sometimes, I think that's what we do best.'

I feel a layer of moisture blanketing my vision, and I swipe at my cheeks with the back of my hand, my eyes growing wide as I watch my brother sign and talk.

"Please, don't cry, Mia. And don't let doubts keep you from this. I think this might be your chance at the real thing…"

I'm even more astonished now, and a slight smile forms on my lips.

'You're, what? Giving us your blessing? Did we travel back in time or something?'

My brother rolls his eyes. "Don't be like that. I'm not saying you should jump without looking. God knows where that got me… I mean, not that I'm complaining because I got my Anna out of it. But that shit was hard on me. I'm just saying you should see where things go. Trust your gut, your heart… tuck your brain away for a while. Because what this guy can give you… I could never ask for more for you. For better."

I giggle as I cry.'Really? Was he THAT persuasive?'

My brother laughs. "He was. And it wasn't just what he said. I'm going to tell you one crazy thing now, and then I'm going to ask you something after."

'Okay…'

"He was telling me that he cares about you, right…?! Promising up and down that he would never hurt you. And I'm standing there thinking it through. I'm seeing that he means it and everything, but… I'm still not one-hundred percent sure. So… he must have seen in my eyes that I didn't really believe him all the way or something. He stops mid-talk and walks to this electric bass guitar sitting in the corner on its little stand, right?! Grabs it… I'm no expert, but… that thing was a beaut…"

I frown at him.'What do you mean WAS?'

He gestures for me to wait and goes back to tell his story.

"He turns to the two guys that were in the suite with him… and he's asking them on the spot to tell me all about this bass. And they do… they tell me it's Gabriel's favorite. That it's worth like three million dollars or something. That freaking Sting played it. That it's a fucking lucky charm and everything. And your boyfriend or whatever the hell he is… he goes apeshit, and fucking smashes the guitar hard against the wall, sis! I'm not kidding you!"

My eyes go round. I'm so flabbergasted I even use my voice without meaning to.

"What? Why? Why would he…?"

My brother sighs. "To make sure I got his point. He basically told me there was nothing he wouldn't do to keep you out of harm's way, nothing he wouldn't give up for you. And Mia, it wasn't that the thing was worth a fortune… he had fucking tears in his eyes, sis. He broke it, and I could see how much it hurt him to do it… that he would put himself through something like that just to make sure I got that he really feels for you... fucking let that sink, sis. I mean, that was totally fucking insane, but the man convinced me, that's for sure."

I simply sit there, stunned. I know which bass my brother's talking about. Carson has told me all about it.

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