Page 57 of Montana Freedom

“That’s me.” I shifted my coffee to one hand so I could shake hers. “Thank you for seeing me so fast. I honestly didn’t expect it.”

“I had a cancellation, so it was perfect. Come on in.”

Her office was cozy. Not quite the “lie back on the couch in a stuffy library” vibe I’d expected. Instead, it was more neutral with a healthy number of plants in the sunny windows and two big, comfy chairs for us to sit.

Rayne herself surprised me. She was younger than what I thought of as a “therapist,” with long brown hair curling around her shoulders and wearing an outfit that was both cute and professional. I recognized her own touches, while at the same time noticing no extremes that could push someone to form an opinion about her on sight. It was smart.

“Now, if you’re at Resting Warrior, I think I can make a couple of assumptions,” she said. “First, the people there care for you, and you’ve seen some kind of trouble.”

I took a sip of the coffee before sitting in the chair. “The first, maybe. Or we’re getting there. The second? Yeah, you could say that.”

She crossed her legs and grabbed a notepad. “Why don’t you tell me about it and why you’re here? And you can see if you feel like I might be the right person to help you.”

Where did I even start with something like this? “Well, before I get into all of it, I need to tell you there’s an asshole of an FBI agent lurking outside waiting to talk to me after we’re finished. So, if you happen to see someone who looks like he has a stick up his ass, that’s him.”

Rayne blinked once and then burst out laughing. “Okay, noted. This sounds like it’s going to be interesting.”

I shrugged. “I’ll explain all of it in detail, but the summary is my biological father is the leader of a huge network that runs illegal guns and drugs. He kept me locked in a cage for a month with the intention of murdering me and, as far as I know, is still going to kill me on sight.”

She’d started to write something on the paper but looked up at me, eyebrows rising. “I see why you made an appointment. Can you start at the beginning?”

“You can’t say anything to anyone, right? Not even the FBI?”

“Correct. Nothing you say to me leaves these walls. I’m duty bound to keep all information confidential without a direct court order. Given the FBI outside, is that likely?”

“Probably not. And even if it were, there’s not much they don’t already know.” But hearing her say this was entirely confidential made me feel better anyway.

“All right. I’m ready whenever you are.”

I took one more sip of my coffee and started at the beginning.

* * *

“And that’s where we are now.” I glanced at the clock. “I think we’re out of time.”

Rayne waved a hand. “I don’t have another appointment. We can take a few minutes.”

She’d listened with rapt attention to the whole story. Thewholething, including everything after the cage. Including Seattle and Daniel. She didn’t bat an eye at our relationship, and I guessed she already had an idea of that part from Daniel. Since he had been struggling with it, he’d likely talked to her about it.

“What would your goal with therapy be, Emma? There’s no right answer, but depending on whatyouwant, we can tackle things in different ways.”

“I—” Stopping, I thought about it. “I know there’s no wrong answer, but is it okay if I say I don’t know? I’m still in the middle of it, so part of me doesn’t know where to place this. It’s not in the past since it’s still happening to me. I’ve just beengoingthis whole time, and only in the last few days do I feel like I’ve slowed down.”

Rayne nodded. “It’s totally fine not to know. Many people don’t, especially when they’ve had experiences on the same level. Deep, formative things.”

“Yeah.”

Formative was certainly one word for it. Life-changing was another.

“Do you think you’ll be here for a while? And by here, I mean Resting Warrior and Garnet Bend.”

“Yes.” My answer was instant. “At the very least, I want to be. I’m going to try however I can to stay.”

Setting her pad aside, she leaned forward on her knees. “How about this, then? If you feel comfortable continuing with me for a few sessions to get more of an idea of how I work and whether we’re a good fit, we’ll make an appointment for next week. In the meantime, let the question of what you’d like to work on just rest on the back burner. Sometimes what comes from therapy and speaking things out loud takes time to unfold in our minds. It might come to you. And if it doesn’t, that’s fine too.”

I nodded. “I’d like that.” Nothing had happened to make me think Rayne and I wouldn’t work well together. She was a warm and comforting presence, and I understood why Resting Warrior worked with her, after just the one session.

We made plans for the next week, and she smiled at me. “Great. And please feel free to call me if something happens. If you’re triggered or anything else. There’s no reason for you to go through anything alone.”

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