Bang. Bang. Bang.
Bang. Bang. Bang.
Bang. Bang—
I scream when new sounds rattle the car window, my hands coming to my ears to muffle the noises. I’m too far gone to realize someone is saying my name, tapping on the window, and telling me to unlock the door.
The sensory overload has me curling into myself, face wet with tears, throat raw from the bloodcurdling cries, until suddenly, someone is holding me.
Not like Elmer, the mailman, did when he was trying to get us both out of there alive, but with a strong hold full of comfort.
Not just holding me with a purpose but pulling me into their arms to remind me I’m here. Not there. Not at the park, or bleeding out under Elmer, or crying for my mother as I’m being rushed to the hospital.
Just like that night, I’m picked up and cradled close to someone with a promise of safety. But unlike that night, I feel it.
Safe.
“I’ve got her, Dad,” I hear. Hair is gently moved away from my face. Then, in a much softer voice, I hear the same person say, “I’ve got you, Austen. It’s okay. You’re safe now.”
You’re safe now.
I’m laid onto a seat, where I curl into a fetal position and wrap my arms around myself. My head is lifted a moment later, and something hard but warm is placed under me as a headrest.
Fingers move through my hair in calming strokes. Subtle. Gentle. Cautious.
“You’re okay,” that voice tells me again. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”
Those fingers coax me into a softer, lighter side of oblivion than I felt ten years ago as they brush my hair and caress my skin as smoothly as his words do.
Noah says, “You’ll always be safe with me.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Something heavy andwarm is draped over me and tucked under my sides before fingertips gently move hair out of my face and behind my ear. They linger there for a brief moment, causing little tingles to settle under my skin.
“Is she sleeping?” someone asks from a distance, making the welcoming touch disappear and a throat clear.
Footsteps creak against the floor. “Yeah.”
“Noah…”
“Stop making it into a thing, Bailey. She needed somewhere to go,” Noah says, tone not offering room for argument.
It sounds like they’re in a different room, so I crack an eye open. I’m lying in a bed I’m unfamiliar with, but it smells like Noah, so I don’t panic. The door is ajar, and Bailey is standing within eyesight with her arms crossed.
“Shehassomewhere to go,” Bailey reminds him just as coolly. “Her house. You could have let your dad take her if she was too freaked out to drive herself. Or he could have taken her to his house if she didn’t want to go to hers. This was supposed to be our first night at the apartment together.”
I hug the blanket Noah placed over me, waiting for his response. She isn’t comfortable about me being here, in his bedroom. Or is it theirs? Nobody has said a word about them moving in together. I knew he’d been saving up for his own place because his first studio apartment was awful, but I didn’t know he’d moved.
An overwhelming sense of sadness hits me, knowing I’m suddenly out of the loop. Nobody updates me on Noah anymore unless it comes up in passing conversation, and that’s rare. Not even his mom will offer up information on the off chance we bump into each other. She’ll ask about how I’m doing, if I’m ready for the fall semester to start, and if I’m looking forward to the new chapter in my life.
Most of the time, I lie.
Because I know telling her I’m terrified wouldn’t get me anything but a pep talk that would barely touch the anxiety burrowed deep into my brain.
A long sigh escapes Noah. “Don’t you think it’s a little selfish to be upset about her being here? She’s gone through enough, Bails. I want to make her comfortable.”
What she says next catches my attention, making it hard to stop from squirming and giving myself away. “Don’tyouthink I have a right to be upset, considering I haven’t stayed here before? I’m your girlfriend, Noah, in case you’ve forgotten. Nobody would like their boyfriend putting some other girl, much less one who has acrushon you, in their bed. Don’t call me selfish for feeling exactly how anybody else in my position would.”