Page 126 of Wanted You More

Bang. Bang. Bang.

“Oh my God! Someone call nine-one-one!”

CHAPTER FORTY-NINE

Iknow immediatelywhere I am when I wake up. Long before I open my eyes to see my father and brother by my bedside. The sounds of machines beeping and the scent of antiseptic burning my nose has me fully aware that something happened.

Dad’s eyes are bloodshot.

Wolfe’s face is pale.

It’s like before.

When I was eight and woke up without my mother by my side. She would have been holding my hand, brushing my hair with her fingers, and promising everything was okay.

I don’t know why that breaks me.

But it does.

I start crying before they can say a thing.

Until my throat hurts from the hiccupped sobs that won’t stop no matter how tight Dad holds me to him.

The first words out of my mouth surprise everybody, including me. “I want Mom.”

If it’s possible, Dad squeezes me tighter. Not too much that it hurts but makes some of the pain ease. And when Wolfe gets on the other side of the bed and says, “Me too,” there’s a shift in the room.

After extensive questions from doctors, they deemed my stay an accidental overdose.

Overdose.

I could have died.

But the EMTs saved me.

The EMTs.

One in particular. The one standing at the doorway silently, his red-rimmed blue eyes piercing into me as my family comforts me.

Dad tugs on Wolfe to give me time with the boy who’s eerily quiet as he approaches me.

He takes my hand, squeezes, and blows out a breath he might have been holding since he arrived at the scene.

“Don’t youeverdo that to me again,” he tells me, voice hard with concern. “I thought…I had no idea what happened to you when I saw you on the ground.”

His whole face is red with anger. Jaw ticking, he sits on the edge of my bed and studies me. Those knowing eyes give me a once-over before his freehand scrubs over his face.

“I didn’t mean to,” I tell him. I’m not sure what was found in my system. The name was too long and unfamiliar, and the doctor wasn’t exactly nice about it when she asked if I’d purposefully taken it. “I just wanted to get out and have fun with my friends. It’s been a hard week. Hardmonth. I didn’t do anything on purpose.”

His gaze lifts back to mine. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know if you wanted me to.”

His face slackens. Sitting straighter, shoulders squaring as if he’s on guard, he says, “I don’t know why you’d think I wouldn’t. I love you, Austen.” There’s a slight crack to his voice that has more tears springing in my eyes. “I hate seeing you like this.”

Licking my cracked lips, I stare down at where he holds me. “If we’re around your coworkers, you don’t play around with me. Don’t touch me. Don’t do anything like you would if it’s just us. You’ve been so distant. It made me think that you were having second thoughts about us. We’ve always been unconventional. That’s why you didn’t want to be with me all this time.”

I’ve never felt as young as I do now, peeking up at him and gauging his reaction. Maybe if I’d just told him, I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t have gone out. I wouldn’t have drank as much as I did. Then I wouldn’t have mixed the alcohol and pills.

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