Page 74 of Reckless Desire

My stomach twists into a painful knot. I blink, but a tear escapes anyway. As time stretches, the only reaction I get is Hunter’s heaving chest.

“I understand if you don’t have patience for my trust issues.”It would kill me.I step back. The extra distance and the wind take away the scent of him and I feel lost. Cold. Sad. “Look, I didn’t mean to ambush you. You have Caro to pick up.”

I look at a group of younger girls skipping in a pattern. Anywhere but at his eyes.

“This wasn’t a good idea or the best place to unload my insecurities on you.” I keep tripping over my words, mortification burning my skin. But my shame doesn’t matter at this moment. It’s the painful hole in my chest and a slow, agonizing shattering of my hope. “I better—”

“Shut up, Sydney,” Hunter snaps, startling me. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”

A sob rips out of me.What?

“The past week has been difficult.” He scratches the back of his neck. “I’ve experienced loss in my life, and you bailing on me after a couple of weeks is up there with the most fucked up situations. But the hardest thing right now is not being able to wrap you in my arms and kiss you.”

Tears break out, blurring my vision, and at the same time a strangled laugh escapes. It’s more like a cough, but I’m past caring.

“Wrong place. Wrong time.” I giggle, I think. “Lesson learned because I really want that kiss.”

He smiles and tension melts from my limbs.

“Go tell the principal about us, and then come over so we can talk to Caro. It’s taco night.”

I nod and wipe my nose, sniffling. “Okay. I have a few things to finish, but I’ll text you when I’m on my way.”

“Hurry, beautiful. We have a lot of fucking to catch up on.”

Only him.

ChapterTwenty-Four

Hunter

“How did it go?” I ask as soon as Sydney walks in. She looks pale and exhausted. My chest hurts when I see her like that. I wrap my arm around her and kiss her quickly. She leans into the hug for a moment but then pulls away. Her eyes dart around chaotically.

“I’m scared.” She looks at me finally and emotions spin through me like a tornado.

“What did the dickhead do?” I growl, keeping my voice down for Caro’s sake.

Sydney blinks a few times. “What? Where is Caro?” she whispers.

“She’s in her room watching a show. What’s going on? What happened?”

Sydney lets out a long puff of air and lowers her forehead to my chest, her hands on my hips. I want to scoop her up, carry her to the bedroom and make her feel better. Make her forget. Or at least wrap her in a tight embrace so she knows she’s safe. But I can’t do any of it until we talk to my daughter. The last thing I want is to explain it to heraftershe catches us kissing.

I rub my hand over Sydney’s shoulders. “Talk to me, beautiful. You’re scaring me now.”

“Sorry.” She straightens up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to. On my way over here, I truly realized how important it is for me that the conversation with Caro goes well, how much is at stake, and I freaked out a bit. But, yeah, the conversation with Dan went strangely well. I didn’t want to be alone with him, so I asked his assistant to join us. I wanted the disclosure to be on record. God knows what he’s capable of.” She sighs, her shoulders loosening a bit.

“That was smart. And it was a difficult step, so don’t worry about Caro. There are two of us to handle that now.” I wrap my arm around her shoulders and give her a peck on her temple. “Let’s get over with it now, so you can relax.”

“You’re not worried at all? That she might not like it?” Sydney bores her green gaze into me. The emotional turmoil of the past week has left shadows on her face. I want to wipe them all away.

“I’m not going to worry beforehand. I don’t do that. Ever.” I stop and turn her to face me. “I’d have spent most of my adult life worrying and still had no control over what happened. Julia died. Caro is growing up without her mother. None of it is in my control. I can spend time making the best out of every situation, or live in constant worry. That decision is in my control. So yes, beautiful, Caro might not take it well, but we’ll deal with that if it happens.”

She bites her lip and exhales a long breath. “I hope some of your outlook on life rubs off on me.”

There is pain, hope and skepticism mixed in her answer, and in that moment I know that I’ll do anything in my power to make her believe that life should be enjoyed. That the only way for us to find peace is from within.

I know I can protect her physically from assholes like Dan Ravinski. I hope I can somehow protect her from the beliefs dickheads like her late husband instilled in her. The latter has just become my life's mission.

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