Page 17 of Endgame

“I think everyone needs some time to cool off,” Corvin interjects. “It’s been a fucked-up night. Val and Dawson are safe here so let’s just get some sleep and work on a plan first thing tomorrow morning.”

* * *

Valance stands next to my bed, the tension between the two of us is palpable. Neither of us can look the other in the eye. For years I pined for her, and mourned the loss of what we shared. The memory of her haunted me for months after I fled on that fucking bus. Looking at her now, I feel nothing but a deep hatred. This woman was once my reason for everything, I fucking killed for her!

“I can’t stay here.” Her softly spoken words have me tensing and shifting my gaze to hers.

“You can and you will.” I expect her to argue again, fight me but what I don’t expect is for her to cover her face with her hands and burst into tears. I stand here just staring at her as she breaks down, dropping onto the edge of the bed, heaving. I look at Dawson and frown, how he can sleep through the sounds coming out of his mother’s mouth is a mystery to me.

“You don’t get it!”

“Don’t get what, Valance?” She drops her hands and stares up at me, the pained look in her eyes affects me more than I want to admit. I fucking hate that after all this time she can still affect me like this! I shouldn’t even be standing in here with her.

“You think you did me a favor! You didn't, you fucking ruined everything, Beckett, and you don’t even see that.”

“The fuck are you rambling about, woman?” I snap. There was a time when her tears would have brought me to my knees and I would have done anything to keep a smile on her face but now, it just brings warmth to my insides knowing that she is hurting.

“You killed my father, Beckett, and you don’t even care!”

Fuck this!

“Go fuck yourself, Valance,” I snarl before I turn and storm out of the room. The only reason I don’t slam the fucking door is that my son is asleep in there. I come to a stop when I see Corvin leaning against the wall outside of his room with his arms crossed over his chest. I grind my teeth and pray for patience. I don’t know what the fuck his obsession with getting involved in my shit with Valance is, but it’s starting to grate on my fucking nerves!

“Is it true?” he asks as I lean against the wall opposite him. It’s no surprise when Darius’s door opens and he walks out to join this little fuckingpow-wow. I roll my eyes in his direction when he shoots me a smirk, fucker.

“Is what true?” I snap.

He pins me with a hard glare. “Did you really kill her father?”

I school my features and keep my face blank. “And if it is?”

“Beck, none of us are judging you. You know better than anyone that we don’t give a fuck about your past, you have been a closed book since the day we met you. All I am asking is, do we need to do any damage control?”

His response shouldn’t shock me but it does. Time and again, these guys prove to me that they are loyal as fuck and I am fucking grateful that I can call them my brothers.

“No. I made sure that there is no way to trace anything back to me orher.”

“You were just a kid, are you sure?” I look at Darius and pin him with a dry stare.

“Yeah, I am fucking sure. No cops have come knocking, have they?”

“Yeah, I guess you have a point there,” D acknowledges. We all stand here in silence for a while. I know that with Valance being here and my past coming back to bite me in the ass I’m gonna have no choice but to tell them everything. “So, does that mean you’re not going to Alaska next week?”

I sigh and run a hand through my hair, I have been thinking about that since the moment I found out about Dawson. Truth is, I don’t give a shit about leaving Valance behind and going ahead with our plans but I can’t leave my son. I know all too well what it feels like to be abandoned by your father and I’ll never do that to my son.

Valance

I wake before Dawson the next morning and manage to sneak a quick shower in Beck’s ensuite. I’ll admit, I gasped at the sight of it. It’s one of those open-plan showers with a waterfall showerhead. I’ve never showered in such an extravagant shower before but I mean, when you’re a gazillionaire I guess you can afford luxuries like that. Once Dawson wakes, I make quick work of getting him changed and brushing his teeth. He is excited as heck to see everyone, this poor kid has been through so much in the past twenty-four hours and guilt is beginning to eat at me.

“Momma, we go?” I smile down at my little guy and nod. If it were up to me, I would spend the day hiding out in this room and avoiding everyone and everything. I guess the plus side is, I know when I open this door that there won’t be a flower waiting for me. I grip Dawson’s hand in mine and lead him from the room. The moment I open the door and squeal in surprise when Beck drops backward and stares up at me from the ground. “Becky!” Dawson shouts excitedly. He flicks his gaze from me to smile up at our son before pushing up from the floor and stretching. The moment his shirt rides up, my eyes zero in on the exposed skin, his jeans ride low enough that I’m able to see the bottom of his abs and that fuckingV.

He clears his throat drawing my attention back to him. I can feel the blush coating my cheeks and push my tongue into my cheek. “Breakfast will be ready soon.” His voice is raspy from sleep, and that’s when I notice he’s still in the same clothes from yesterday.

“Did you sleep out there?” He scowls down at me and doesn’t answer, just tuns and leads the way. Dawson practically yanks me after Beck. I wish I shared his excitement. The moment we enter the kitchen, everyone looks at us and the conversation stops.

Awkward.

Dawson pulls his hand free and races over to Corvin, who is at the counter pouring some cereal into a bowl. It warms my heart when Corvin smiles and picks my son up without any hesitation. This is all new to both Dawson and me. All he has ever had is me and I guess you could count Jeff but no one else. A pang of sadness hits me right in the chest. My own mother left me behind as she fled. Whenever I look at my son and think of how my mother just left me, I always get angry. I could never leave my son, ever. My father may have been a piece of shit but kids are programmed to love their parents no matter what. Even when my father beat me, I still loved him.

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