Page 2 of Knight

“Watching Monday Night Football with Scott’s lame ass group of divorced high school friends also doesn’t count. It’s so weird that you do that. Why would you even want to watch so much football, let alone with a group of Neanderthals?”

She’s never understood my inner tomboy. Growing up, I always preferred to hang out with the guys. She was probably my first true girlfriend. She also doesn’t understand that spending time with Scott’s closest friends makes me feel closer to him. She just doesn’t get that part of me.

“After two years of mourning you promised you would start going out. I said nothing for two full years. I let you do what you needed to do to grieve and loved you through it. But a year ago, you said you were ready to get out and start living again. In the past year since, I can count on one hand how many times you’ve come out, and despite plenty of opportunities on those evenings, you wouldn’t even talk to any guys. You can’t be a hermit anymore. You’ve literally reached the end of Netflix. There’s nothing left to watch. Don’t even get me started on sex. Your vagina must be tighter than a virgin. You’re a born again. Come on, Dare. It’s time to move on. It’s time to get out and meet people. You’re still young. You’re fucking gorgeous. Your enormous boobs still face the right direction. I love you. It’s time. Do it before your boobs head south.”

I feel the tears coming.

“Dare, are you there?”

“Yes, I’m here,” I barely whisper.

“Don’t fucking cry. It’s enough with the waterworks. You’ve spilled enough tears for a lifetime. You need to get out and live your life. You need to have fun. You need to laugh.”

She sighs at my silence. “You need to meet someone. You need to fuck someone. And it’s all happening tonight. Dare, you went from nympho to nun. Time to re-find your inner nympho. You were genuinely the only person I knew who had more sex in a week than I did, and now you’ve had absolutely nothing for three years. You must miss it. Come on. Come out with us. Put yourself out there. I will literally come to your house and drag you out if I have to.”

I grip the steering wheel hard. The silent tears are now streaming down my cheeks. “Cass, I just don’t know if I can. I do miss that part of myself, I really do. But it would feel like it’s cheating on Scott. I can’t explain it to you. I belong to Scott. I don’t think I can be with another man. I can’t fathom another man’s hands on my body. That part of me may very well have died with him. It’s been completely absent for three years. I don’t know if I can find it. I don’t know if I even want to.”

I take a breath. “Cass, I haven’t even touched myself since he died. My sexuality is non-existent.”

“You haven’t touched yourself? What the fuck? You haven’t had an orgasm in three years?”

“No. I think the old saying is true. If you don’t use it, you lose it.”

She scoffs at that. “Riding a dick is like riding a bike. Once you learn, you never forget how to do it. Come on. We’re all on a mission to make you smile and get you laid. Time to rip off the band-aid, girlfriend.”

“You’re unbelievably relentless,” I sigh. “Look, I’ll come, but you can’t just start pressuring me into meeting, and having sex with, random guys. That’s not even how it worked for me when I wasn’t broken. It’s certainly not how it’s going to work for me now.”

“Fine, but if a good-looking guy comes on to you, you need to at least talk to him this time. And you’re not broken. You just need a little kickstart. I’m an excellent kicker. I kick balls for a living.” That’s true, she does.

“Okay. I’ll think about it.” Maybe. Unlikely. “I’ll see you at 7:00 tonight. Just remember that going out is a big deal for me. Don’t make a whole thing about me meeting a man. I’m not ready to jump into the deep end. Baby steps, Cass.”

“Sure,” she lies. “Make sure that you grab an Uber. We’re definitely having several rounds tonight.”

CHAPTERTWO

JACKSON

“Payton, where have you landed on the Abelson Proposal? Do you think we should invest?”

“Well, Dad, I think the properties look like a good investment. It’s not such a great area, so we’re getting in really cheap, but it’s definitely up and coming. I think it will be the new Northern Liberties area of Philly. There are several new construction and development projects going on down there. In the next five years, I genuinely think it will be the place to be for twenty-one to forty-year-olds.” I nod in agreement.

He continues, “Location aside, I’m frankly just not sure that Abelson’s guys know how to manage the project properly. After spending some time reviewing everything, and speaking with his team, I think we should counter that we’ll help them fund the project, but we want to hand pick the management team and oversee construction ourselves. We need our people in there. I know we’re stretched thin right now, but that’s my assessment. I just don’t trust his people to do this project right.”

I look at my son and smile. “I came to the exact same conclusion. If they want our thirty million dollars, they’ll do things our way, with our people, or they won’t get a single cent.”

I’m so proud of my son. He’s smart and has a real mind for this business. Having him at only nineteen years old, he and I sort of grew up together. He’s my pride and joy. I love that he now works for me. I take comfort in knowing that the business will one day be his and that it will be in great hands.

“Go call them and let them know what we’re thinking. If they don’t like it, too bad. They can find their funding elsewhere. They’ll give in. Trust me.”

He nods. “Okay. I’ll call them before I head out for the evening. Do you need anything else before I go?”

“Oh, you’re heading out?” I look at my watch. “I guess it’s almost 7:00 already. I didn’t realize the late hour.” When you have no life and work is all you do, you don’t pay attention to the time.

I look up at him. “Do you want to grab a drink with me?”

“I would, Dad, but I really want to get home to Kylie. I only have her for another week or so before she goes on that ten-day cruise with her girlfriends.” We both scrunch our

noses. We hate cruises.

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