Page 102 of Indecent Ventures

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This afternoon has beencomplete and utter torture. Being around Collin but not being able to touch him or have him touch me is a level of pain I’ve never known. It’s not just the touching. It’s different than at the family dinner months ago. That was physical. Now it’s so much more. I’m used to having him in my space. Having him here but not having him in my space is bothering me.

I see him struggling too. It’s getting ridiculous. We should just tell everyone and be done with it. Maybe things will be awkward for a bit when we break up, but we had an awkward four years, so I’m sure we can deal with it.

He’s in the pool playing with the kids. Just what I need to see. Him being sweet while his muscles ripple as he throws them around. It’s like the water droplets are dripping off him in slow motion. Taunting me.

I’m focused on his pathway to paradise. I know what lies underneath that bathing suit, and it’s exactly that, paradise.

Reagan waddles over to me and hands me a pair of sunglasses. “Put these on. You’re staring at him like you’re going to fuck him in the pool in front of everyone. Other people are going to pick up on it.”

I look up at her. The pain must be evident on my face. Her eyes widen and she places her hand on my shoulder. “Oh, Jade, you’re hurting. Why are you doing this to yourself?”

“Do you think I should end things with him?”

She shakes her head. “No. Not at all. Just the opposite. You’ve clearly fallen for him. If he feels the same, just come out with it. I don’t think the fallout will be as bad as he thinks it will.”

“He’s so non-confrontational. It’s his least attractive quality.”

She rubs my arm. “I’m so sorry. You don’t deserve that. You deserve someone who wants to shout it from the rooftops.”

“Thanks.” I stand. My mind is racing. “I’ll be right back.”

I need a moment to myself. I head inside to the bathroom and close the door behind me. I lean my back against the wall and take a few deep breaths. Tears are stinging my eyes. What the fuck have I done to myself? How did I let it get this far?

About two minutes later, the door opens and Collin walks in, closing the door behind him.

He makes his way to me. “Fuck, Jade. Seeing you and not being close to you or touching you is a fresh brand of hell for me.”

I make my way to him and breathe, “Me too,” as our bodies come together.

He pushes me back against the wall and lifts me by the ass. I wrap my legs around him. He kisses up my neck. “I need to be close to you. Inside you.”

“Yes.” My need to be connected to him is overwhelming.

He frees his cock from his bathing suit, quickly slides on a condom that has magically appeared, slides my bikini bottoms to the side, and thrusts into me.

We both breathe a sigh of relief as if our bodies joining is our sense of peace in the world. We’re still, as his lips simply brush over mine. “Jade, I need you.”

I run my fingers through his hair as I dust my lips over his scruff. “I need you too.”

He pulls my head so that he can look me in the eyes. “Ireallyneed you.”

I nod in understanding.

He starts his movements in and out of me. I don’t know how, considering we’re in a bathroom up against a wall, but what we do isn’t fucking. It’s slow and sweet, full of tender kisses and touches. Full of emotions.

His lips and hands move all over my body, and mine all over his. I know I’ve never made love to anyone, and I’m not sure it can be up against a bathroom wall, but to the extent it can, that’s exactly what happens.

I hate to admit it, but it’s kind of beautiful and special. I’ve never felt so much affection during sex. It’s mutual, practically pouring out of him.

He whispers into my neck, “What are you doing to me?”

I fight back the tears pooling in my eyes. I can’t believe I’m about to be the kind of woman who fucking cries during sex. It’s just so damn intimate.

He rubs away the tear that has trickled down my cheek. “Tell me what you’re feeling, baby girl.”

“Everything, Collin. I feel everything.”

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