Page 84 of Silver Fox's Secret Baby

“I know, just let me hold you.” I squeeze him tighter. “Please.”

He threads his fingers through my hair. “I’ve got you, Harley.”

There is heat in my belly. Not arousal. Connection. Something about carrying this man’s baby makes me want to be closer to him than ever. I tried to deny it for too long.

I know we don’t have much time, so I finally draw away from him, looking up into his eyes. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the baby, it was all just so complicated.”

“It’s alright. I…understand why you kept it from me.” Grant touches my cheek. “I want to be there, Harley.”

My heart gallops. “Of course, you can.”

“But I’m…” His breath is short and shallow. “I’m scared.”

Grant Neville? Scared? “Why?”

“Because what if I’m a terrible father?”

“You won’t be,” I reply, clinging to his waist. “I know you won’t be.”

Grant slips out of my grasp, scratching the back of his head. “You don’t know that. You don’t know for sure.” He crosses away from me and then sighs. “Listen, I don’t know how much you know about my past.”

Not much, honestly. I know that he practically raised Victoria, although I don’t know the reasons. To be frank, Grant was just my dad’s friend all of my life. I didn’t spend a lot of time caring to get to know him until now. Perhaps that makes me selfish, I just think I was young. Things were still waiting to align.

Now here we are.

“You can tell me as little or as much as you want, Grant.” I carefully sit on one of the luxurious sofas. “I’ll listen as long as you need.”

Grant glances back at me, almost surprised. “Um. Alright. Well, I guess my situation was sort of like yours in that I watched the dissolution of my parents’ love. Happened in the blink of an eye.” He goes to lean on the mantle. “Although, unlike you, things weren’t… picture-perfect up until then.” He hesitates before continuing. “My parents were physically abusive to one another. It would either be like their love was the most beautiful thing in the world or the most dangerous.”

“Oh, Grant, I’m so sorry.”

“They never harmed me or Victoria. For some reason, there was a boundary there. But they had tunnel vision when it came to each other,” he continues.

All the use of past tense verbs is giving me a sinking feeling in my stomach.

“They died in the middle of a physical altercation. It was the day of my graduation from high school and things were escalating. I tried to get them to stop and my mom pushed my dad.” He drops his gaze to the floor. “He lost his footing, tripped into the street and there was an oncoming truck.”

“Oh, my god…”

“And of course, she…tried to get to him before–” His voice breaks, but he shakes off the sorrow. “That’s how I became Victoria’s guardian.”

I stare at Grant, wishing I could somehow alleviate the pain. I know as well as anyone, though, that the pain concerning our parents doesn’t just go away. It somehow multiplies. Though my mother isn’t dead, I’ve felt as though she is for a long time. Even being face-to-face with her didn’t make her real. “Grant, I’m so sorry.”

He clears his throat. “The point is, I’m not afraid that I’ll be…abusive.”

“No, of course not.”

“But the intoxication, the tunnel vision. I don’t want to lose myself in someone, and I don’t want that for you either. You know, I’m older and you’re probably not looking to slow down any time soon, so–”

“Well, I’m pregnant. I’m going to have to slow down for at least a little bit.”

Grant pauses, taken a bit off-guard. He nods. “Yeah. That’s true. A baby…ourbaby needs safety. Not the drama of a relationship. I don’t know if I know what that looks like.”

“You’re thinking about it. I think that’s a good sign already.”

Grant smiles.

“Look, Grant, I’ve been with an older man before. It’s why I left Australia.”

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