“That wasn’t my fault!” I say. Which then leads me into explaining how Grant’s PR person reached out to me about getting one of the artists from Infinium on the show. “And then I suggested Grant come on…” I say. “So, I guess it was kind of my fault.”

“It was a good show, I don’t think you should be upset,” Drew says. Dana thwaps him on the arm.

I smile. “I didn’t know you listened.”

“Harley! Not the point right now!” Dana admonishes, getting me right back on track.

“Sorry! Okay!”

I dive back into the story, telling her about how amazing everything has been since the show. How people are asking for interviews and my show is finally getting meaningful national traction. All thanks to Grant.

“So then, I ran into him at the Auras last night and…” She doesn’t need the whole play-by-play. “Things just…happened.”

Dana sighs. “Oh dear, Harley.”

“I know, it was so stupid and I knew we shouldn’t, but we did and now I feel so guilty, Dana. I feel so guilty.”

She smiles kindly. “I know you do.”

“What do I do?”

“Well, what do you feel?”

“Uh, guilty. I just said tha—”

“Not that,” she says with a shake of her head. “How do you feel aboutGrant?”

I furrow my brow. “Um…”

“Well, she either likes him or she’s coping,” Drew says. “Can I have another piece of coffee cake?”

“S-sure,” I say, sliding the box his way. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

Drew looks to Dana for permission to continue talking. “Go ahead. You are clearly hearing something I’m not,” Dana says, leaning back in her chair.

“Well…” Drew swallows his latest mouthful of coffee cake. “The first time can be chalked up to just a chance meeting. Pheromones. Impulse. You know. A fling. But then you did it again. When you had an opportunity to step away and be rational. Which I think says something.” Drew frowns and starts to gesticulate with his hands. “Clearly, you know that there is an element of danger here. And yet, you’re pushing beyond that to satisfy some part of yourself. The question is…is that because you’re not dealing with something perhaps painful that needs to be tended to so you’re self-sabotaging? Or do you like him?”

“Wow, Drew, that was…” I trail off. His words have hit me like a ton of bricks. “Wow.”

Dana smiles. “I’ve taught you well, grasshopper.”

The three of us sit in silence as I sink into what Drew has just said. “It would kill Dad if he found out,” I say softly.

“Yeah. It would, probably. But that’s not squarely on your shoulders. Grant was a part of this too.”

I don’t like how Dana uses the word “was” even though I know that’s how it should be.

“But you know it would kill Dad even more if he knew you were shying away from something you thought would make you happy. Especially on his account.”

Our eyes lock, matching amber blazing together.

“Damn. That’s good, Dana,” Drew says. “Can you believe I get this therapy for free?”

Dana glares at him playfully, “Yeah, maybe I need to start charging by the hour again.” Then, back to me. “Just think about it, Harley. You know what to do. In your heart.”

Her words stick with me long after I leave the café and well into weeding with Dad. He’s so happy to see me that the guilt weighs heavier than ever on my mind. Thank god we don’t spend long on pleasantries and coffee before he hustles me out to the garden to work on pulling out the overgrown weeds in the garden.

Dad fields questions my way about the awards show from the night before. I answer as plainly as I can, disinterested, chalking it up to my hangover, until he asks a question I can’t ignore.