Page 21 of Wreckin' Amethyst

“Let me ask you this - do you think the turmoil you’re feeling is because of her specifically? Or could it be this is the first time you’ve been thrown a curveball outside of the carefully orchestrated life Carter has provided you, and the unknown is causing you discomfort?” I sit upright at this. Did I imagine the contempt at Carter’s name, or is Gillian far more understanding of my situation than I’ve foolishly thought this whole time?

There’s no easy answer. No real way of knowing, and it takes several minutes of pacing to put my thoughts in order.

“I’ve been ostracized my entire life for crimes I didn’t commit. And I’ve never given a shit. No one’s opinion of me has ever mattered, until I’m stripped bare by her stunning, violet eyes. None of the fame or money can shield me from her, and I’m convinced she doesn’t like what she sees.”

“In the same way you use the accusations against you as a protective shield, or allow your father to continue paying Carter to keep you sated,” Gillian makes a small noise in the back of his throat. I still, looking at him quizzically. I’m sure he’s saying more than he should, but I need to hear all of it. Gillian waves his hand through the air. “What I mean to say is, it’s easier to be the man you’re perceived as, even though innocent. You’re hiding in plain sight, and I believe Amethyst is the reason you’re only just realizing it.”

Dropping back down on the chair, the weight of my confusion leaks out on my next exhale. Like a fog clearing, my mind is suddenly blank. Gillian has summed up my entire internal struggle in a few simple sentences. I should have confided in him years ago.

“Do you believe there is a right person for everyone?” I hang my head, elbows braced on my thighs. All I need is a simple ‘yes’, to validate my motives going forward. To convince me Amethyst is my person, and my gut instincts have been right from the start.

“I believe there are certain people for the versions of ourselves we allow to be known. Who could have been right for you ten years ago isn’t necessarily right for you now, as we change and grow so much through the years. But if Amethyst is who you need now to be your best self, there’s nothing holding you back from pursuing her.”

“Perhaps. But she rejects my advances at every turn. No amount of charm can convince her otherwise.” I push my hands through my long hair, fisting tightly at my scalp. These words, as reassuring as they are, don’t change the fact Amethyst doesn’t want me.

“And how does that make you feel?” Gillian pushes, delving deeper to the root of my anguish.

“Scared,” I admit, my voice low.

“Why?” Gillian pushes again. I don’t have to contemplate my answer, my head jerking upright to pierce him with a gaze so direct, there’s no room for doubt.

“Because if she can look straight through all the bullshit, she’ll realize there’s nothing there to see at all.”

A buzzer breaks through the tension in the air. The door pops as Carter releases it from the outside, permitting my escape. Usually, I’d be two steps out the door within seconds, looking for a quick fuck. A fast release for the pent-up frustration I will never hold Carter accountable for. He saved my life by taking the manacle of my future, but he’s damned me all the same. Gillian reaches for his satchel, packing away his notepad and book. Rising panic congeals in my throat. Unanswered questions all melding into a rush within my ears.

“So, what would you suggest I do?” I shoot upright to stop Gillian from leaving, grasping onto our session like I never have before. Gillian pauses before me, smiling kindly and pats my chest.

“Not as your therapist, but as your friend, I advise you to give yourself some grace. Rushed, forced connections are your go-to. Give Amethyst the chance to fall for the man behind the money. It’s going to take a little more time. Requires a little more work, but the reward will be worth it.”

Chapter 15

Atsomepointduringthe afternoon, I decided to put some real clothes on. Fitted jeans with enough stretch in them to squat, a black tank top and a pair of converse. More material than I’ve worn since becoming the embodiment of ‘Amethyst’. The persona before, a shy girl called Fiona who was a girl scout leader by day and swindler by night, would have worn something similar with a chunky knit cardigan. Yeah, I got bored of her very quickly.

Leaving my purple hair free to swish along my lower back, I leave the Elites building just as Carter storms past the pool. Owen has returned, lounging with Sebby on recliners, shirtless in board shorts. Sunglasses shield their eyes from a perfectly warm Autumn day. Probably one of the last we’ll have this year. Myles surfaces from the shimmering water, every muscle of his torso flexing as he pushes himself free of the pool. Whole gang’s here.

“Wanna explain this to me?” Carter booms, slamming a brown file into my left tit. Ow.

“Is it a manual on the quickest way to give someone breast cancer?” I glower, taking the file and rubbing myself as Myles appears at Carter’s back. Dripping wet, dangerously moist. Peering inside the file, my eyes flick back to Carter. “There’s nothing in here, dickwad.”

“Exactly,” Carter growls, taking the final step closer to get in my face. “That’s the background check I had pulled on you along with the other applicants. None of my contacts could find a single thing.”

Despite myself, I snigger. Any validation I needed was just freely given, knowing not even Carter’s top connections could break through the webbed layers I put in place to keep myself off the radar. Tension radiates from his bunched shoulders, anger seeping from the fists at his side. Had the present company not been within sight, I’m sure those hands would have me pinned against the building.

“You’re in my home, eating my food, meddling with my affairs, so I’m only going to ask you once. Who the fuck are you?” It’s on the tip of my tongue to whisper ‘your worst nightmare,’ but another response leaves my lips. One which will undoubtedly rile him more.

“Aren’t you property of Hudson and Sons? Making everything around us, his,” I jerk my head to Myles. Amber eyes seek me out through the darkness of Carter’s persona. Flecked with brown, caged behind a glaze of misery as much as he is. I heard plenty during his counseling session, and knowledge is power.

“Get the fuck out of my sight,” Carter moves in a flash, punching the wall beside my head. I don’t even flinch. Holding his green glare for a moment longer, until I’m sure the vein in his temple will burst, I smile sweetly and scoot myself free.

“Gladly,” I mutter beneath my breath, already entering the manor. The Elites are busy steam cleaning the lounge and moving the furniture back to their original positions, before being used as a waiting room. I make it all the way to the entrance lobby when Myles finally catches up to me. I nearly thought I’d be venturing out alone.

“Hey, wait up,” he calls. Concealing my smile, I turn and tilt my head in question. This close, and seemingly alone, I allow myself to admire the damp expanse of his torso. His entire body is inked from jawline to waistband, a mixture of skulls, roses and all-seeing eyes. Entirely colorless, they blend into each other with the help of swirling smoke, weaving amongst the symbols. Over his heart, a giant cross has been shaded to perfection, the jewels encased within glimmering with white highlights. Beneath his chin, the wide wingspan of a dove follows the length of his jawline.

“I’d like to, if you don’t have plans, possibly spend some time with you, outside of the manor. Away from…people and…” A hand runs through his blond hair. I roll my eyes. The way his shorts are dripping onto the marble, his stalling only increases the slip hazard he’s creating around his Air Jordans.

“Well, since I’ve aged about forty years since you started that sentence, I’ll just speed things up. Let’s get out of here.” Grabbing the handle of the front door, Myles continues to stutter.

“Wait, really? Okay well, um, I’ll just change my clothes-”

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