Page 41 of The Butler

It was Starr. “Copy. On my way.”

My dress whites were hanging in the small closet when I ran to my room and hurriedly dressed, scrambling up the several flights of stairs to the helipad. It seemed like only yesterday when I’d done the same when Linc had arrived. Except this time was to say goodbye. That is if he’d actually say goodbye to me while I stood in a long line of crewmembers.

The crew lined up in a straight line as we waited for the primary to arrive from the salon where he’d been staying cool out of the harsh sun. We were in order of rank which left me miles from Starr and Jake. The sun beat down on my face and I slid my finger between the collar of my dress shirt and the skin on my neck. I was nervous as fuck. What would I say? Would Linc shake my hand? Hug me?

It didn’t take much time to find out when I saw Linc and Bob coming up the steps to the pad. Three deckhands carried their luggage directly to the copter and got back in line immediately. I stared straight ahead and ignored the exchanges going on fifteen people away. I was dead last in the line and waited to see if Linc would get this far. As he made his way down the line, a few hugs, laughs, and handshakes took place.

My breath hitched as I watched the crew member beside me receive a handshake and a couple of atta-boys from Linc. And then, there he was. The man I had been intimate with for nearly two weeks. He appeared pained when he stood in front of me. My hands were at my side and my heart stopped along with my ability to inhale air.

Linc held his hand out for me to shake so I accepted. He held firmly but did not shake it as we stared into one another’s eyes. We simply held hands as our eyes remained focused. Mine were full of tears and his were the saddest pair of eyes I think I’d ever witnessed.

“Thank you, Deklyn,” he began, a slight quiver to his lower lip. “I appreciate your excellent skills while assisting me and would be happy to provide you with a recommendation should you need one. Please feel free to contact Bob.”

I couldn’t speak because a million emotions were lodged in my throat, so I smiled through the tears and let go of his hand. I wanted to touch him, beg him to stay, and ask him for a chance to get to know him away from here, but I had nothing when I tried speaking.

“Okay then,” he whispered, turning back to the rest of the line and waving one last time to the assembled team. Jake and Starr were fixated on our interaction and quickly looked at him when he stepped toward the copter.

I watched as he made his way to the open door of the mechanical bird where Bob was waiting to let him board first. After Linc had climbed in, Bob made his way to me quickly, stopping in front of me and leaning in due to the noise from the copter as the rotors started spinning.

“The job offer is still on the table, Deklyn,” he yelled into my ear before pulling back and handing me his card.

I mouthed“thank you”and stared straight ahead. That wouldn’t be happening.

CHAPTER THIRTY: Lincoln

The copter lifted off while I stared out the window on the opposite side and away from the crewmember line. I simply couldn’t bear to watch as Deklyn disappeared from view. The well of tears in my eyes had barely survived the goodbye and I didn’t need Bob noticing and giving me shit about.

My plan for two weeks of relaxation and healing from Troy had been a complete failure. I felt even worse if that was possible. What had been an attempt to focus on my emotional wellbeing and reconnecting with my closest friends, was upended by the discovery of a beautiful stranger. Dek was a wonderful young man that I had stupidly asked to enter a fuck-pact because I was afraid I’d lose my chance if I didn’t nail him down with some sort of stupid agreement.

I’d managed to listen to warnings from Bob about not getting fleeced again and how a relationship with another boy was a bad start to a new life after Troy. Advice I now wished I had taken and instead allowed a natural process to happen between Dek and I.

“You okay?” Bob asked.

“I’ll be fine.”

“I didn’t ask if you’ll be in the future, buddy. I’m asking how you are right now,” he stated. “Can you look at me?”

I swallowed hard and cleared my throat. “I’d rather not if that’s okay.” I fussed at a bit of dander on my black golf slacks. “I’ll just go home like I did months ago and try to reset again.”

We remained silent in the passenger cabin as the copter whisked us to shore and my waiting private jet. The water was brilliant and blue, with small white caps of waves moving below us. The Pacific had always been my favorite body of water from when I was a child and spent holidays in Hawaii. Sure, I’d been to most oceans and several seas, but I’d fallen in love while sailing the Pacific Ocean, so she was my loving embrace. There was a magic about this part of the globe and I was afraid she’d done her wizardly tricks on my heart once again.

“I’m going to need some time, Bob,” I said. “You can meet with me via Zoom or you can come to the beach house in Malibu. Your choice.”

“We have a meeting with Comcast next week,” he reminded me. “We need to give them an answer on the streaming company.”

“The answer is no,” I stated rather bluntly. “I have no need for more acquisitions, Bob. Enough is enough.”

He tapped my arm to get me to turn around, which I did. “You’re not serious, are you?” he asked. “This is a once in a lifetime deal for your studio.”

“We’ve got enough, Bob. We’ve got enough,” I repeated, trailing off and turning away again. “Adding another zero or three to my bank balance isn’t going to improve my life.”

“Jesus. You do need time away from business,” he stated. “Sleep on it though, will ya? We need the Comcast deal.”

I jerked around and glared at my best friend of twenty years. “What I fucking need is to be loved,” I choked, shedding what protective mental layer I had left. “I’m fucking sad, Bob. Can’t you see that I am fucking sad right now?”

“I know, buddy,” he whispered. “Business always perks you back up though.”

He’d hit a nerve that had recently been exposing itself inside my heart and head. “I have enough shit, for fuck’s sake, Bob. I want to be in love. I want to love someone that sees me and not my goddamn bank statement.”

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