Page 86 of Cursed Beasts

Was that Lucien?

I knew mate bonds were intimate, feelings could be shared and for more powerful wolves, the ability to communicate through a mind link was possible.

Was he feeling what I was feeling? Because this felt a lot like panic.

What would happen if I went back to my family? What about Caston? My anxiety spiked again, thinking of the repercussions if my family found out that I had mated with their enemy.

What would Lucien say when he found out I couldn’t give him children or that I was technically married?

Another howl sounded, easing my anxiety again. I needed to go back to sleep before I gave myself a heart attack. I had a million questions for Lucien. Some I think I knew the answers to, but I didn’t know how different they were compared to regular wolves. My mind sifted through all the information I had until sleep claimed me again.

I woke up intending to walk straight to the library to demand answers. The closer to three it got, the more nervous I felt and the more I wanted to hide away just a little more before I accepted that my life was going to be changed entirely from this one bite.

My life would never be the same.

I sat on my bed and stared at the door, at war with myself, until I started to pace. My body was sore from the delicious night I had with Aeon and Lucien, but it was a reminder of what had happened. This wonderful feeling I kept returning to was the cause of my panic, I didn’t know what to do. My uneasiness intensified the longer I stayed in my room. These feelings weren’t just my own. I think I was feeling Lucien's emotions too, but I wasn’t too sure.

I opened up Vivienne’s grimoire, remembering something about mating. Flipping through the pages, I found what I was looking for, it was her last entry.

They would all be mine and I would be theirs. They would bite me and then we would complete a Belladonna ceremony. The elders, the alpha, and my father were hoping we will be able to power share or have children even more powerful than the world had ever seen.

There’s a lot riding on this theory, a lot of what ifs, and I hated that we are just hoping for the best? My biggest worry is my children and what they will be put through. And worse, what if they don’t inherit the power?

I tried talking to Zev about it, but lately he’s been very distracted. War changed him and I miss the young man who was a little more carefree. I am tired of waiting for a man who won’t ever love me, and I need to stop with these childish dreams.

This didn’t tell me anything except what their families wanted to do. I checked my watch seeing it was three-thirty; I knew I was being a coward, but I couldn’t bring myself to talk to him yet. His bite changed everything, and I wasn’t ready to face the consequences of it. A knock on my door made my anxiety soar.

“Kit Kat, we need to talk,” Lucien said, sounding unsure.

I couldn’t bring myself to say anything, but I walked to the door. I held onto the doorknob, unsure what to do when he knocked again.

“Can I just see you? I need to make sure you are ok,” he pleaded, sounding like he was in pain and my body reacted before my mind could shut it down.

I opened the door quickly. Lucien looked disheveled, dark circles marred his eyes and he looked torn about what to do. He was shirtless, showing off his amazing physique with just a pair of trousers on. My body, again, decided for me when I threw myself at him, and he caught me as I wrapped my legs around his torso.

Everything disappeared the moment he wrapped his arms around me. Finally, I felt like I could take a deep breath. I was home.

“Kit Kat—”

“Not yet, Lucien,” I pleaded with him. “I’m not ready. Just give me today and we can talk tomorrow.” He pulled away from me to see tears in my eyes. This scared me and everything we needed to talk about was just too overwhelming for me. He must have seen that, because all he did was nod.

“Can I hold you for a little more?” he asked. “Being away from you has been hard, and I know you’re supposed to typically stay close to your mate after the bond is complete but—well, we can’t do that.”

“Ok,” I said, burrowing my face into the crook of his neck.

Lucien backed until he hit the wall. He slid down until we hit the floor, and we stayed in each other's embrace. He burrowed his face into my neck, placing kisses on my mark that sent a feeling of contentment and relief through me. Slowly, all of our tension washed away, leaving us to enjoy each other’s closeness. His embrace was like a calming drug I was growing addicted to.

“We barely know each other,” I whispered.

“I know this isn’t ideal, but I don’t regret what I did. I’d suffer this curse a thousand years if it meant I would find you. You’ve given me hope that everything I’ve had to endure has been worth it.”

His confession brought more tears to my eyes, and I held on to him tighter.

“I’ll spend the rest of my days making sure you want for nothing, that you feel protected, and you never live a day without knowing how I feel about you. My wolf has longed for you since the beginning, but the man has craved you just as long.” He ran his hands through his hair as I silently cried.

How long had I wished for someone to say something like this to me?

“You are perfect with or without magic.”

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