Page 112 of Bleeding Hearts

The high wooden ceilings with modern chandeliers hanging from them add light to the place once the sun sets. The entire place is everything I ever imagined it would be. It’s completely perfect.

“Thank you, Monica,” I say kindly to the realtor. “I would’ve never found this place without your help. Once we open, bring your family and come in to eat. It’s on me.” I smile at her.

“Of course, Demi. It was my pleasure to work with you,” she says. “And I’ll definitely be taking you up on that. Lydia tells me you’re a phenomenal chef.” She grabs her purse from where she set it down on the hostess stand to dig out the keys.

“Enjoy your new place,” she calls out after saying goodbye to both me and Lydia. Her job here now done.

“So, are you happy, sweet girl?” Lydia asks once it’s just us.

“Yeah, I really am.” I spin in a circle, taking it all in. “Thank you, Lydia. All of this is happening because of you.”

“No, this is happening because of you.” She shakes her head. “Maybe I gave you the money to help get you off the ground, but this is your success. You worked hard for this. And everything that comes after, all the rave reviews that I know you’ll get will be because everyone is finally realizing how incredible I’ve known you are all along. You deserve this.”

“Thank you.” I smile at her as tears prick the corners of my eyes.

The words seem small for all that she’s done, but the way she nods back at me with a smile, I know she understands how much I mean them.

“Now you just need a name for this place,” she says, and I smile to myself because I already know the name, not that I’ll tell her yet. Although, I already know that she’ll love it.

“I’m sure I’ll come up with something soon,” I lie. I’ve always been an awful liar though, so she looks at me suspiciously as soon as the words leave my lips, but she doesn’t question it. “Feel like hanging out for a little? Asher’s on his way to meet me here now to see the place.”

“I wish I could, but I have to get to the doctor, and I’ll be late if I don’t leave now,” she says, looking down at her watch.

“Everything okay?” I ask, wondering about what doctor she’s off in a hurry to see.

“Oh, yes, it’s not an actual appointment. I have a date with a doctor, and I’m meeting him at his office. A private practice, apparently.” She smirks.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you date anyone since I met you,” I say, surprised. Lydia has always talked about how Harvey was the only man she’ll ever love, so the fact that she’s dating is surprising.

“Yeah, well, I figured everyone else is facing their fears lately. It’s about time I start doing the same.” She winks at me.

“I’m happy for you, Lydia. And proud.” I smile.

“Yeah, yeah. We’ll see how it goes.” She turns away from me to walk toward the door, although I can see the slight blush forming on her cheeks before she does. “Let me know when you want to stop hiding the restaurant name from me,” she calls out as she walks out the door and I laugh, knowing she saw right through me.

I walk over to the bar top, hop up onto it, and set my purse down next to me. I dig through the bag, pulling out the letter I found in my mailbox this morning.

I stare at it, my name and address written across the envelope in neat, small handwriting. Then I look at the return address, specifically the name on it. Clara Rhodes. My mother.

I was in a rush this morning when I decided to grab my mail, and I shoved the letter in my bag quickly when I saw what it was. I haven’t had the time to open it until right now, but still, I’m hesitating.

I’ve texted my mom multiple times since she came forward, just telling her that I’m here for her. That I bought a restaurant. That I forgive her. But I haven’t gotten any response, until now, in the form of this letter.

I take a deep breath, ripping open the envelope and preparing myself for whatever she wrote inside. Then I start reading.

My dearest Demi,

I’ve sat staring at this piece of paper for what feels like hours, yet I still cannot think of where to begin. All I do know is that I have to start somewhere, and it feels like the only place that I can start is with an apology. I am so sorry.

I always wanted to be a mother. When I found out I was pregnant with you, regardless of the fact that it wasn’t planned, I was ecstatic. Your father may have said hurtful things to you, but know that I always wanted you. I loved you from the second you existed.

I only wish that love could’ve stopped me from the decisions I made after you entered the world. But it didn’t. Instead, I let your father’s manipulation control the decisions I made. I let it turn me bitter. I let it turn me against you.

I was a horrible mother to you. I never protected you how I should’ve. I blamed you just so I wouldn’t have to confront the true problem and then my own fears. I tricked you into a harmful situation. I did truly awful things, and I will never be able to apologize enough for them.

I lived through the abuse of your father for a very long time and it turned me into someone I don’t recognize, a person who I don’t want to be. I’ve found a therapist who I adore, and I’m taking steps to recovery every day, but I have a long road ahead.

That’s why I have not answered your texts. I’m not ready yet, but I hope someday soon I will be.

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