Page 53 of Fearsome Dream

Bam. Bam.Bam.

We hurl plate after plate into the fireplace, muttering our frustrations and then simply pouring them all into the jerk of our arms. With each throw, a little more tension seeps out of Riva’s expression.

She lobs the last plate with a little battle cry. We stare at the heap of broken shards for a moment before I will the heat into my eyes to char all that pottery into dust.

Then Riva spins toward me and wraps her arms around my chest.

My pulse hitches with pleasure just at the knowledge that she feels comfortable enough to hug me without hesitation now. That I’ve shown her she’s earned that comfort.

My happiness swells more at her words, muffled in my shirt. “Thank you. I needed that.”

I scoop up her small frame easily and sit us both in the nearest armchair. Nothing could feel as good as having the woman I love cuddle deeper into my embrace as easily as breathing.

I lower my head over hers, drinking in the crisply sweet scent of her hair. “We’ll fix this. There’s got to be a way.” Even if I’ve got no clue what that is at the moment.

Riva grimaces. “I know Balthazar’s gone, and everyone important in the Guardianship probably is too. But everything still feels so messed up, and I don’t know how to help the other shadowbloods. They don’twantto be helped.”

“They haven’t had much time to really think about it,” I point out.

“But they’re stuck with the criminals Balthazar picked out. Who knows what those jerks are going to be telling them?” She rubs her forehead. “They’re just kids. They shouldn’t have to deal with any of this crap.”

“I know.” From the moment Riva found out the younger shadowbloods existed, she’s always cared so much about looking after them. Wanting to save them from having to go through as much torture as we did.

Even with all the crap the guardians did put us through, they couldn’t stop her from knowing instinctively how to act like a big sister. Or even…

The stray thought wriggles through my brain and sends a strange sensation that’s both giddy and terrified washing over me. I stroke my hand up and down Riva’s arm from shoulder to elbow, but the idea doesn’t drift away. It only grips me harder.

I hesitate and hug her tighter. Riva glances up at me as if sensing there’s something I’m grappling with.

I might as well spit it out. If she laughs or recoils, well, then I’ll know.

“Do you think… I mean, we don’t even know if it’s possible for us… but way down the road, when everything is okay and we have regular lives… would you want to make the family the six of us have a little bigger?”

Riva stares at me. Her hand drops to her belly. “You mean like—”

Heat flares in my cheeks. “I just—I know how much you care about the kids, so it’s easy to imagine—obviously it would bewayin the future if it happened at all—”

She reaches up and touches my face, letting the softer warmth of her palm cool my blush. “I haven’t really thought that far ahead. It’s kind of scary letting myself imagine a future that normal. But I could see wanting that and being ready for it someday.” A coy smile curves her lips. “And you’d make a great dad.”

My skin flushes even hotter. “I’m not sure—I’d have to work on a lot of things.”

Riva does laugh then, but it’s one of the sweetest sounds I’ve ever heard. “I’ve seen you with the kids too. When you were carrying George around on your shoulders while we were hiking through the jungle, giving him pep talks, you practically looked like you werehisdad.”

The reminder sends a pang through my chest. George was a good kid.

And he died on the last mission the guardians sent us into.

I press a kiss to her temple. “I guess it’s silly to think about that stuff when we don’t even know what we’ll be doing tomorrow.”

Riva snuggles even closer. “No, I think it’s good to have some kind of dreams. Even if I’m too scared to really hold on to them just yet. I’m glad… I’m glad that we’ve gotten to a place where we can have dreams like that.”

My throat clogs with emotion. “Yeah. Me too.”

I might have tipped up her chin to really kiss her then, but as the words are leaving my mouth, Billy bursts into the room with his curly hair flying wild around his faun horns.

“Riva, Zian, you need to come. We’ve just seen—the other shadowbloods are attacking the mortals.”

Nineteen

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